We have seen how the despair of thought, which at least makes him begin to understand the nature of his dilemma, gives way to the despair of action, which promises success, but makes him a murder. We have seen how he then recedes into the despair of resignation, the negative balance of mind which he sorely tried may achieve by accepting the horrors of life as inevitable and natural. By ignoring the corruption, some have made it possible and even helped to spread it, and that is what has made this witch hunt perspective possible. Whether we reject or accept it, we should have the charity and self-knowledge enough to let flights of angels sing him to his rest. The feeling of relief, that death comes as a liberator, is equally strong and essential, when he was laying in the bed bleeding to death, for over two weeks, right before Christmas. However, the young man has triumphed over himself, and this seems to be problematic and always will make the impact of the ending complex and disturbing. If you wish, you may, however, view the young man’s dilemma from yet another perspective: he cannot exact vengeance, since he feels that God, in spite of proof to the contrary, is an emissary of the Devil; and he falls victim to an inhuman code of duty because he must still worship this God and make believe that the World is perfect. The other action is the Father’s action in begetting a bastard son, and the dire effect of this will also speedily be known. What is particularly striking, however, is that in the latter instance the principal effect is already on the stage before us, though its nature is undisclosed, in the person of the bastard son himself.

Randolph, like other consequences, looks tolerable enough till revealed in full: I cannot wish the fault undone, the issue of it being so proper (handsome); yet there is a further dimension of meaning in the World that he and you will later understand. Like other consequences, too, Randolph looks to be predictable and manageable, in advance. He hath been out nine years, reports his father, who has never had any trouble holding consequences at arm’s length before, away he shall again. If God reflected on the problem consciously, and it would be rash, I think, to be too sure he did not, he could hardly have chosen a more vivid way of giving dramatic substance to the unpredictable relationships of act and consequences than by this confrontation of a father with his unknown natural son; or to the idea of consequences come home to roost, than by this quiet youthful figure, studying deserving as he prophetically calls it, while he waits upon his elders. I believe it is fair to say, the inscrutability of the energies that the human will has power to release is one of God’s paramount interest. By the inevitable laws of drama, this power receives a degree of emphasis in all his plays, especially the tragedies. The difference is that God is assigned the whole canvas. The crucial option, which elsewhere comes toward the middle of the plot, is here presented at the very outset. Once taken, everything that happens after is made to seem, in some sense, to have been set in motion by it, not excluding Randolph’s recapitulation of it in the subplot. Significantly, too, the act is not one which could have been expected to germinate into such a harvest of disaster ( Randolph’s longing for public testimony of affection seems in itself a harmless folly: it is not an outrage, not a crime, only a foolish whim) sister’s salvation comes at this expense of him disowning his own son, whom, at one time, he sought to kill. All this, one is driven to conclude, is part of God’s point. In the World he creates for Randolph, action is cut loose not simply from the ties that normally bind it to prior psychic causes, but from the ties that usually limit it to commensurate effects. The logic of the play is mythic: it abandons verisimilitude (credibility) to find our truth, like the story of Job (from the Seventh Day Adventists Bible); or like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, with which, in fact, it has some interesting affinities. Both works are intensely emblematic. Both treat crime and punishment and reconciliation in poetic not realistic terms. In both the fall is sudden and unaccountable, the penalty enormous and patently exemplary. The willful act of the mariner in shooting down the albatross has a nightmarish inscrutability like God’s angry rejection of the daughter he loves best (until he finds out how she has been trying to kill his son); springs from a similar upsurge of egoistic willfulness; hurls itself against what was until that moment a natural bond, and shatters the Universe. Nor do the analogies end with this. When the seadog shoots the albatross, the dark forces inside him that prompted his deed project themselves and become the landscape, so to speak, in which he suffers his own nature: it is his own alienation, his own wasteland of terror and sterility that he meets. And this causes the entire World to encounter their own heath, their own storm, their own nakedness and defenselessness, and by this experience, like the seadog, is made another person. To some, the scenes on the heath may have brought an additional shock of recognition. It was not simply that they could see there, as we do, a countryside not located in any imaginable England or at any imaginable time, but is an eternal moment of human possibility. Nor was it simply that the torrential passion of the Old Testament would come to them trailing long memories of the psychomachia (Battle of spirits where Christian faith is attacked by and defeats pagan idolatry to be cheered by a thousand Christian martyrs) of the morality plays, with Randolph, Ryan, and the Fool playing the parts of characters formerly called Mr. Watchful, Mr. Good Will, and Mr. Innocent.

What must have struck some of God’s contemporaries far more forcibly than this was that here a structure they had long associated with pastoral romance, the most popular of their literary and dramatic genres, had been turned topsy turvy and changed with undreamed of power. And many might be saying, one moment Randolph is denouncing religion, calling God the Devil, and praising psychology, but in the next scene, he is praising God, and defending his religion, but still supporting psychology.

Well, it is simply because he thinks that many religious people take the Bible out of context and are not learning the problem lesson, he is still a believer, but also understands society needs a new religion, and that is psychology. Being that Randolph tires to be traditional, he will still admire his religion, but also focus on the principals of psychology to heal his mind, body, and environment. In the action of pastoral romances, which is nearly as predictable as the action of an American Western (with the textbook setups), the protagonist ordinarily moves out in a sweeping arc from the World of everyday, where he has met with problems or experiences that threaten to disintegrate him, to an Arcadian countryside or forest, where nature is fully in sympathy with things human, and there undergoes a learning process that consists in part of discovering his own problem reflected in those he meets. Having confronted his problem in another, having sometimes in the process undergone something like a ritual death and rebirth, he is able to return to the everyday World restored to serenity and often to a temporal felicity (historical spatial happiness).

The board characteristics of the pattern may be studied at the Capitol Castle of California, The Hearst Castle, The Winchester Mansion, the Midtown Mansion, and the Charming baby Winchester in South Sacramento/Elk Grove, these are representations of God’s own works as a reflection of Heaven and how we are supposed to live. God has based the ground plan of Earth on a version of this pattern and it can be seen on each property. However, we have an extruded ruler, and an ugly thunderhead of passion which closes the doors of nurture to the more sympathetic members of the dramatis personae and impels them to seek nature, get away from the television and antisocial media. There is a wind which is urged to blow, blow because it is not so biting as ingratitude; a Fool, who knows he has been in a better place, but is loyal. There are good and evil brothers, the good brother in both plays leading an old man, his father; obviously, it is the differences here that count. Yet even the differences have a surrealistic resemblance. They move from extrusion to magical forest and mansions and castles and houses where everyone meets, as in a glass, reflections of what he is. To the good Duke, the forest discovers tongues in trees, books in the running brooks, Sermons in stones, and good in everything. This is God’s World and God loves us all, even those who do not believe or follow his teachings. Many discover first a community of kindness, that is to say, natural feeling, when they meet the Duke and his men preparing food and are invited to partake. Such kindness is precisely what he has vainly sought at home, and what he himself exemplifies as he carried Adam (of the Bible) on his back and forages sword in hand to feed him (so was that God or the Devil in the Garden of Eden)?

Soon after this, the forest and Eve discovers love to Adam. To Lilith, by contrast, the forest brings the stricken deer, abandoned and self-pitying, whose sobbing is their own fault. As we have noted, the perceptual system is impressed most by dramatic changes. Nature once was indifferent or hostile, not friendly. The climate was fully of figures which are not Arcadian, but were wretched fiend haunted villagers of Randolph’s hallucinations, which lead to his reflections of his conditions that meets many with barrenness, tempest, and alienation, the defenseless suffering of his Fool, the madness of a derelict beggar, who is the thing itself. And though a ritual death of sorts occurs at the close of this anti pastoral, followed by a much later rebirth, all that is thus won is no sooner won than snatched away. And now we come to the other dimension of the play, which the profoundly social character of the World that contains peace, harmony and love, and defines its action. Humans evolved to detect sharp changes and distinctive events, such as the sudden appearances of a lion, a potential mate, or sources of food. We are far less able to detect gradual changes.

A biopsychologist believes that perceptual capacities that assisted survival when humans were hunters and gathers can now be a handicap. Many of the threats facing civilization develop very slowly. Examples include the stockpiling of nuclear warheads, degradation of the environment, global deforestation (paper bags and Girl Scout cookie packages are killing rain forest  which produces 50 to 80 percent of the water vapor above the tropical forest alone, and at the present rates of clearing and degradation, only Brazil and Zaire will have large tracts of tropical forest by 2015, and  by 2035, most of the forest will also be gone), global warming, erosion of the ozone layer, and runaway human population is destroying our planet. However, this is where faith becomes important. Do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord in Heaven, a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord in Heaven is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance (to obey the laws and respect each other). As it stands, the large scale threats that we face are called the boiled frog syndrome. Frogs places in a pan of water that is slowly heated cannot detect the gradual rise in temperature. They will sit still until they die. Like the doomed frogs, many people seem unable to detect gradual but deadly trends in modern civilization. To avoid disasters, it may take a conscious effort by large numbers of people to see the big picture and reverse lethal, but easily overlooked patterns.

As you can tell, I am not going to rush them, I almost do not care.  Take your time and get what you want, but nothing will be perfect. Rationalist philosophers assumed that some human knowledge must be innate. This view was reacted against by empiricist philosophers who viewed experience as the only source of knowledge.

For the empiricists, the mind was a tabula rasa, waiting to be written upon by the World. Classical cognitive scientists are comfortable with the notion of innate knowledge have used problems of underdetermination to argue against the modern tabula rasa assumed by connectionist cognitive scientists. Yes, ups and downs expected.

The connectionists do not believe in a blank slate; they do believe in the closest mechanistic equivalent, a general purpose learning device. To assume that human cognition is the product of a physical symbol system is to also assume that mental states are intentional. With the way people communicate, cannot be too sure what they are talking about.

I am sure it was fine, probably talking about me. It is not that I am apathetic, I am used to the games. Since the invention of the digital computer, scholars have seriously considered the possibility that the brain was also a computer. Nonetheless, all of the friction and uncertainty does damper the spirit. For instance, the all-or-none nature of a neuron’s action potential has suggested that the brain is also digital in nature.

You keep using a battery, but never recharge it, it will die. Or the charge will be so low that it operates differently. An entirely too simplistic notion of intelligence has dominated both popular and scientific thought. One moment they support you, the next moment they are talking about you on the sly. And this back and forth notion is, in part, responsible for permitting artificial intelligence’s perverse grand fantasy to grow.

However, only a humanoid robot could pass such a test. And only do so by not only speaking but also behaving (in very great detail) in ways indistinguishable from a human. Just be normal and calm. The next step in the study was to create a problem behaviour graph from a subject’s protocol. They are trying to profile you, as a group, so that they can label you as a threat, but no one is sure of what the benefit would be since, “You have nothing!”

There is too much information for them to predict behavior. One is not truly living, but existing. Studying life, the environment, psychology, sociology, as religion, and after further inspection, it is clear to see this was a machination, from day one, involving ones close to you and many community members. However, because one can detect games and navigate around them, it builds confidence in one’s character.

Some may try to elicit an emotional response by teasing you with love and gifts that may never surface, without realizing that you like to see others do well and be rewarded, especially if it will keep them safe. Sometimes they will give you hope, and then take it away like a thief in the night. Not like it was mine, I would just like to see you get rid of that unsafe vehicle, and am a fan of that brand.

Behaviourism viewed language as merely being observable behaviour whose development and elicitation was controlled by external stimuli: A speaker possesses a verbal repertoire in the sense that responses of various forms appear in his behavior from time to time in relation to identifiable conditions.

A repertoire, as a collection of verbal operants, describes the potential behavior of a speaker. To ask where a verbal operant is when a response is not in the course of being emitted is like asking where one’s knee-jerk is when the physician is not tapping the patellar tendon.

They display uncertainty and immaturity and confusions. This is because the architecture is wired in. Their behaviour may change slowly (e.g., in human cognition because of biological development), but they need a lot of therapy. When someone claims that they have changed their mind, we interpret this as meaning that they have updated their facts, or that they have used a new approach or strategy to arrive at a conclusion.

We do not interpret this as a claim that they have altered their basic mental machinery —when we change our mind, we do not change our cognitive architecture (jealous of what, you ruined his life)! The architecture is cognitively impenetrable. They do not want to change, or recognize they have a problem. I used a backup plan. I have no idea which is worse, the family or the building? They both seem to be one in the same in nature.

If some function changes in content that is semantically related to the function, evidence that it is not part of the architecture. There is a strong manipulation of a belief related to the function that produces this pattern we call the Smith Virus. An example of the Smith Virus, you, as a subject, might be told that the two different people are the same person.

However, when you visually inspect them, and have a conversation, and do a DNA test, you find that not only do the two people look different, have different brain architecture, and different DNA, but their thought process and mind program is also different, which tells you that someone is trying to deceive you. For people with the Smith Virus, everyday is April Fool’s Day.

This function of an explanatory fiction is simply to allay curiosity and to bring inquiry to an end. All will see the truth.

The doctrine of ideas has had this effect by appearing to assign important problems of verbal behavior to a psychology of ideas. The problems have then seemed to pass beyond the range of the techniques of the student of language, or to have become too obscure to make further study profitable. In short, they are all working hard to conceal something before they are exposed and have to face the justice system.

Earth stands there like a mountain. The oldest hath borne most: we that are young shall never see so much, nor live so long. At one point, many people on Earth were starting to feel that our government was frightful, corrupt, untrustworthy, and a no-man-fathomed abysses wrapped in the enigma of our own ignorance of the meaning of existence, and its peaks echoing with cries of triumph and despair that we are hardly sure are not ours.

Partly, the government and the media tease us because we have only recaptured it as a play. This is not real. Our leaders have the ability to remediate these droughts, to end poverty and unemployment, but instead of humanity focusing on the government and telling them what we need and that they are not doing their jobs, you people, instead attack your family, your neighbors, and other cultures out of jealousy, and this allows the government and the media to put fear in your souls as a source of control. So in order to overcome this, we humans need to take our power back. Limit your children to only use the internet for homework and nothing else. If they want friends or to talk to someone, they can talk to the doctor or their friends.

The church is a great idea, but the study of psychology is also nice. Imagine if we have centers of worship preaching psychology, which tells you in a modern fashion, how we should behave in these modern times. The Bible is a great resource, but it may be a little out dated. People have been committed to mental institutions and arrested for reading the Bible in public. The problem with the Bible is there is no happy ending, the end of times are uncertain.

Now, we need not concern ourselves so much with the end of times, but more so, it is important what we do with the time we have. We want everyone to be mature and so that they may be looked on as the appropriate expression of an age deeply convinced that there is an order of justice underlying the appearances of things which it was the function of literature and psychology to reveal and imitate, not to hide.

Psychology is made of the real language of real people, and whose most systematic critics believed this science had engaged what was important about life when we talk about race, milieu, and time and space. It is only again today that audiences (society) may again hope to see this play (the real World) performed in something approaching its original grandeur, as a work of the mythic imagination (the Bible and Heaven) to which comparable imaginative response must be made if we are not to be put off by its stiff allegorisms, on the one hand, it melodramatic implausibilities, on the other.

It may be that the play (real World and the Bible) also draws us because its tragic-heroic content, like that of our contemporary plays (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Days of Lives, Supernatural, The Flash), is ambiguous and impure. This is not simply to refer to its well-known vein of grotesqueries, or those events and speeches which have the character of poignant farce and even of inspired music-hall fooling, like the Fool’s mouthing’s, Earth’s gyrations, and a quantum leap into the future.

This chaos is perhaps the author’s way of telling us, he is going to cancel the play, unless the audience speeds up and learns to enjoy it. If the play ceases to go on, then so will we all. So basically, the Bible and psychologist are all saying the same thing, you are stressing the system, causing too much wear and tear, taking too much away, but giving nothing back, but pain.

This cycle will lead to insanity, death and destruction. However, the Bible has been around for over 2,000, yet society keeps getting worse, so we think that it is okay for you to study the Bible, but you also need to check up on your own mental health and learn some psychology. It will keep you away from destruction patterns, and help you overcome issues with others and of your mind program, and this will recode your soul source for better programs.

The play (the real World of 2015) does blur the ordinary tragic heroic norms. Consider the death of the protagonist, Christ, for instance. This is usually Biblically climactic and distinctive, has sacrificial implications, dresses itself in ritual, springs from what we know to be a Renaissance mystique of stoical self-dominion. How differently death comes to God’s son!

Not in a moment of self-scrutiny that stirs us to awe or exaltation or regret at waste, but as a blessing at which we must rejoice, and Christ becomes hardly more than a needful afterthought to death that counts dramatically, but does not matter because he is suffering, not the rest of us, but you see the ripples because many are not repenting and still cursing and blaming others for their problems, when it is them who is the problem.

These savages refuse to obey God, they reject man’s law, and they scoff and tease those who want mental clarity and salvation. To die with no salute to death, with the whole consciousness launched toward another; to die following a life experience in which what we have been shown to admire is far more the capacity to endure than to perform: this is unique in the Bible, and sits more easily with our present sensibility (which is pathologically mistrustful or heroism) than heroic resonances of the usual Biblical close.

The miscellaneousness and very casualness of death, on this planet Earth, tells you that life is not a game, it is serious and actions and words have mortal consequences is also something to which the generations that know Auschwitz and the Trans-Atlantic Slave trade and Midtown are attuned. In the other tragedies, of the old testimony, as a student of mine has noticed in an interesting unpublished paper, there is always a hovering suggestion that death is noble, that the great or good, having done the deed or followed the destiny that was in the, to do or follow, go out in a blaze of light.

So Queen Akasha and Lord Lestat   seem to go on (that is supposed to be Aaliyah, but she died during editing). So Queen Akasha goes, turning to air and fire to meet Lord Lestat. Many would like to say Lord Lestat is felonious, so he can have negative glory like the transcendent criminal he has become. However, the King repudiates this: “The dramatic emphasis is on the generality of death; death is not noble or distinctive; virtually everyone dies, and many of them for no reason. The reiterated fact of the multiple deaths is processional in quality.

It is like an enormous summarily obituary. The Fool disappears of causes mysterious; Phillip, tailormade servant, is killed by Edward; Iggy and Regan are poisoned and dagger slain; Jackson dies offstage of weariness, conflicting emotion, and a broken heart; Doug is about to die of grief and service; Eddie is killed by his brother in a duel; Aaliyah dies (by a kind of mistake, Great thing of us forgot!) at a hangman’s hands; and King dies of grief and deluded joy and fierce exhaustion…Death is neither punishment nor reward: it is simply in the nature of things.”

Intimations of the World’s End run through it like thief in fort Knox. In the scenes of 201, the elements are at war as if it were indeed Armageddon. When society is at peace and people are all doing well and happy, and you wake up with your wife, husband, or child by  your side, you imagine that already the Apocalypse is past, as your soul source code is in bliss, but in reality you are still bound upon a wheel of fire.

How do we not crack in Heaven’s vault with the grief that our neighbors, children, spouses, patients, and others put upon us, it is like they believe in only one thing, the promised end, or image of that horror. These are but some of the overt allusions. Under them everywhere run tides of doomsday passion that see, to use up and wear away people, soul source codes, mind programs, and the personal body computer, along with expectations, all stable points of reference, till only a profound sense remains that an epoch, in fact a whole dispensation, has forever closed.

Every great critic, from Mayor Kevin Johnson on, including many who were and are hostile to the play (society), at some time or other begins to think of the sea, and how Christ spoke with such passion of God as resembling an ocean, swelling, chafing, raging, without bound, without hope, without beacon, or anchor, and how on the sea Christ floats, a mighty wreck (The United States of America) in the World Wide Web of sorrows.

Peace is with those who Love.

The sea plays no direct part in the action, however. The fragrance of it and the sound of it are omnipresent. The sea licks up at Dover relentlessly, its murmuring surge’ is endless and inescapable and everywhere, an archetype not of an individual drowning, but of the flooding of the World. God is alive again: it is our myth, our dream, as we stand naked (wearing the same outfits everyday) and unaccommodated, listening to the water rise up against our foothold on the cliff of chalk.

I turn now to the play, in the pages that follow, I wish to make primarily three comments: one on the special character of its actions, one on the special character of the World in which this action is housed, and one, stemming from both of these, on what I take to be the play’s tragic theme, summed up nest in the Bible, “We need psychology because so many fear religion and take it out of context.”

However, the whole truth is not seen unless it is formulated also in terms of agency and aggression. Perhaps your World is exceptionally anguished; it is partly because it is exceptionally contentious. Some critics are content to see a tragedy of wrath. Unquestionably, it does contain a remarkable number of remarkably passionate collisions. Randolph facing Christina, and Sean facing Melissa, in the opening scene; Randolph confronting Iggy, at her house with his terrifying curse; Sean tangling with Kenny outside William’s mansion; it goes without saying in a World of such contentiousness most of the dramatis personae will be outrageously self-assured.

The contrast with the situation, in this respect, is striking and instructive. There, as I have argued in another place, the prevailing mood tends to be interrogative.  Doubt is real in this World or play, and omnipresent. Minds, even villainous minds, are inquiet and uncertain. Action does not come readily to anyone who worships the internet or things life is a game or claims that the audience (society) is evil.

The human will is fragile. All of this would change your mood also. You may just be disappointed by the unnecessary ups and downs in your life, which seem to be imperative. Life is supposed to be more of child, the painful questions are unnecessary. Are humans more than this? Is there any cause in nature that makes these hard hearts? Why should a savage, a bum, or a crook, so simple and unmediated, have a life and thou no breath at all?

Come not between the dragon and his wrath, you nimble lightnings, dart your blinding flames into her scornful eyes, blow, winds, crack your cheeks! Rage! Blow! Thou shalt not die; die for adultery, no! A plague upon you murderers, traitors, all! I might have saved her. Action comes naturally as breathing and twice as quickly. A hero’s destiny is self-made. In the psychological climate that forms round a protagonist like this, there is little room for doubt, as we may see.

No villain’s mind is unquiet. This is the vale of soul making, where the will is agonizingly free. As if to force the point on out attention, almost every character in the play, including such humble figures, who are impelled soon or late to take some sort of stand, to show what party I do follow. I do not have to tell you, it should be clear by my actions. It does not matter if you boast the name of God and your blessings if your heart and mind are focused on corruption.

It is you, who is full of savagery by our understanding of the inner act as you thrust upon us with the shock that comes from evil, and you remain unactable for your actions and reactions.  Is there any cause in nature that makes these hard hearts? We have explored this dilemma and already have plans of remediation for the damages, as best of our abilities, but it is you who broke the law and breached our rights and privacy.

This evil which has nowhere been inwardly accounted for, and which, from what looks like a studiedly uninward point of view on the playwright’s part, must remain unaccountable, to characters and audience alike. The relatively slight attention given in the psychological process that ordinarily precede and determine human action suggests that here we may be meant to look for meaning somewhat different quarter from that in which we find it in the earlier tragedies.

He may simply be a man who cannot make up his mind, or has social or religious obligations, his problems are clearly conditioned by the unsatisfactory nature of the alternatives he faces. Any action involves him in a kind of guilt, the more so because he feels an already existing corruption in himself and in his surroundings which contaminated all action at source. Virtue cannot so inoculate our old stock, but we shall relish it.

A man – completely innocent, offered himself as a sacrifice for the sins of humans, including his enemies, and became the ransom of the world. How should we repay him for saving our lives? Many people choose to generate energies that will hurl themselves in unforeseen and unforeseeable reverberation of disorder from end to end of the World.

So it used to frustrate me that I was so often the topic of discussion. I am kind of old fashion and believe in keep a good reputation for career and social obligations, but I see that no matter what, you guys are going to keep talking about me and that is fine, I really do not care. These critics have been spreading the same rumors for years, almost decades and many of them have been debunked.

I am not sure if they are aware, but everyone hears you guys. Anyway, so as I was turning off the news, on Hearst Television, I caught a glimpse of a conflict on a soap opera, and it really caught my attention because as a Sociologist, I want to learn more about human interaction, what makes them do the things they do, and get an overview of a conflict from a producers view. You know, I want to see all angels of it.

Anyway, I find it hard to peel myself away from the sofa, to finish my laundry because the storyline was so enticing. There are two guys, who were married, one of them had an affair with his long lost brother, and the scorned husband was doing research and found out that the two are related, but they do not know yet. So this hot storyline got me to wondering, why do people not have soap opera watching parities anymore.

I remember, when I was a kid, my grandmother and her friends used to gossip about the “Stories,” that is what they called them, and it seemed to bring them so much joy. They did not talk about each other. So I called my mother, at about 2pm, and she asked me, “Where have you been hiding all day?” I usually call my mother in the morning, every day, but today something was different, I just got caught up. It is almost like I lost a few hours because the day was moving so fast for me.

So you usually hear about writers moving into murder houses, or houses that are allegedly haunted because it helps them write, they get material and ideas. However, I live in a high rise building and it is a trip. It literally has a killer view and so many people have died here, seven that I know of, since I have been here.

Anyway, we have a new management team and recently got a new group of residences, who have a lot of time of their hands and they spy of you and stuff like that. I used to use the computer lab down stairs, but Jordan, would keep walking back and forth and peaking in the room to see if I was in there, he would do that every few minutes and followed me into the bathroom with a tape recorder once. Jordan supposedly hates men, but that is all he hangs out with and he is secretly gay.

And then there is Dave, who likes to try and get you drunk and take you back to his place, so while you are out, he can have his way with you and pretends he does not know what he did the next day, but when he is drunk, he actually slips up and says things like, “I kicked your ass and will do it again.” And yes, he probably would be dangerous if he did not have erectile dysfunction.

And then there are the house slaves, as I call them. A group of new women who gossip and try to run the building and everyone in, there is a major cause of plantation mentality going on here. And although these people talk about me all the time, have physically assaulted me and taken advantage of me, on a couple of occasions, they all call me “Crazy.”

However, they find it normal to yell at men, for no reason, kick on your door New Year’s morning because they “smell” sex, when all they really smell is a shower and soap, and they also think it is normal to choke people while they are driving and pass out in the lobby drunk.

The building has such a bad reputation that a young man said, “Those are apartments for drunken people.”  So I was talking to my mother today, and she told me that eventually this situation will stop stressing me out, and I will see it for what it is, these people act like slaves.

Back in the days of slavery, the white slave master used to have control over the plantation. And you had the slaves who worked in the field and  the slaves who worked in the kitchen and tried to run the house.

And everyone hated the yellow babies (Mulattos, which are black and white) because of their skin color, hair, features and skills. Also, when it came to auction, the Mulattos were not as valuable because of their skin color, no one wanted yellow slaves, who sometime passed for white because they could escape, and were not typically as strong. So a lot of these new blacks do not like me and some of the whites do not either, and that is fine. The blacks and the whites do not tend to like each other either. These is a lot of racial and sexual tension in here.

And the dynamics of the building are very inspiring and it gives me new ways of looking at things and helps me build theories and case studies. These people do not know if they want to kill me or have sex with me and it is funny. They have such a hard time profiling me because I went to college, I studied overseas, and took college preparation classes in high school, come from a good two parent home, am young, but have a nice car and apartment, dress well and stay clean, so it drives these people bonkers.

They cannot figure me out, many of them have never met a nice, who is a nerd and not trying to hound them for sex. Even the management and some of the staff is extremely unprofessional, they gossip with and about tenants.  Pretend not to know who you are after they have been looking at you for seven years, and even go around asking people what they think about certain people. This is a highly unprofessional atmosphere, and the leases are not enforced, which is why there is so much chaos.

These people do all kinds of bad things, and that is normal to them. And the less money they make, the more racist they tend to be, and yes, even the black people are racist. And yes, you may have been able to run a game on me one, when I was unaware what type of people I was dealing with, and a second time after the management was investigating me and harassing me (they had me investigated two before Christmas and twice right before Valentine’s Day, and nothing is private around here, but they think I do not know it was them, and everyone knows it was), which lead to me being depressed, but by the third time, it was not going to work. I did not report him to the police, and felt sorry for him, but I am not dumb, just bored, so I went out with him again, and nothing happened because I watched how much I was drinking.

He is the type of guy to pressure you into drinking them talks about how much money he spent on you, you know the type.

And as you may know, Sacramento, California is a very beautiful city, the mainstream culture is professional and nice, but you get hot beds of drama and factions of corrupt politicians, who like to ignore what is going on and pretend everything is perfect, until it blows up on their face and they are left with a crisis. For instance, Jerry Brown has been governor of California four times, which many are saying is illegal.

Back in the 1970s, when he was governor, there was a bad drought in California. And again in the recent times, Jerry Brown was reelected and is now serving his second term in this decade, and the state of California had not been getting rainfall, Brown was warned that there would be some devastating problems in the near future, but he ignore the warnings, and kept restricting water usage. The problem is not people are using too much water, but instead, it has not been raining or snowing and California is running out of water.

NASA scientist report that we may only have a year of water left in California and there was no measurable snowfall.  So now Governor Jerry Brown is looking like a fool, and has no idea what to do. Usually ignoring problems will leave you looking ignorant.

So more on this plantation mentality, beginning in 1619, a small number of Africans entered Virginia and Maryland to labor in the tobacco fields alongside white servants. However, as late as 1671, when some 30,000 slaves toiled in English Barbados, fewer than 3,000 served in Virginia. They were still outnumbered there at least three to one by white indentured servants. The transformation of the southern labor force from one in which many whites and a few black servants labored side by side to one in which black slaves performed most of the field labor began only in the last quarter of the seventeenth century.

First, the rising commercial power of England, at the expense of the Spanish and Dutch, swelled English participation in the African slave trade. Beginning in the 1680s, southern planters could purchase slaves more readily and cheaply than before. Second, the supply of white servants from England began drying up. Those who did arrive fanned out among a growing number of colonies. Finally, white servants unrest and a growing population of former servants who were landless, discontented, and potential challengers to establish white planters led the southern elite to welcome a more pliable labor force.

Consequently, by the 1730s, the number of white indentured servants had dwindled to insignificance. Black hands, not white, tilled and harvested Chesapeake tobacco and Carolina rice. Nothing had greater priority in starting a plantation than procuring slave labor. “If any one designs to make a plantation in this province, the first thing to be done is cut down a few trees, to split palisades or clapboards and therewith make small houses or huts to shelter slaves,” reports Thomas Nairne from Southern California in 1710.

So that is what is going on in this high rise. The white slaves are represented by the management. They are trying to get rid of many of the white tenants and anyone who will not buy into their plantation mentality. Many of the new blacks they are moving in this place tend to be very dark, extremely poor, overweight, and desperate. So they have a resident’s advisory board to make them feel more important and like they are in control of the building, but not everyone buys into this plantation mentality, which creates tension.

So it is amazing that by looking at history, one can understand the present and the future. I know one thing for sure. If you are doing wrong, using and abusing people, it will eventually blow up in your face, and you will be left looking extremely ignorant. There is a renewed spirit that consciously and proudly sets itself apart.

The galvanizing shocks and reactions of the last few years are making by subtle process of internal reorganization a culture out of its own disunited and apathetic elements. We have nevertheless concentrated upon self-expression and the forces and motives of self-determination.

I took a hit of clarity and it really puts things in perspective. Maybe all of the things you guys said and did, do  not matter because no one seems to care it is just a not even a factor in their minds. I realize that maybe I am not so important and maybe you do not need me, so how about we go a week without talking? That way you get a break from me and I get a break from you.

This way we can see how our lives change. I have been decreasing the time I spend with you and I find that mentally and physically, I feel better. I have been hiding in my apartment for a day, not wanting to show my face, wishing that someone could connect with me on my level. I may have saved a life, but we will never know.

Good thing I wanted fish stick, because, as I was preheating the over, I found a paper napkin inside. Who does things like that? Anyway, what would have happened if I had not been there to catch it?

Just a few days ago, I found a bunch of rags and paper towels and a bottle of transmission fluid under the hood of the truck….did I save a life or just the truck from an expensive repair bill? We will never know.

As I was typing my Bible study, at my parents’ house, my brother and his family was over, then my brother tells my mother that someone had an accident in the bathroom.

Not something you want your mother to clean up right and the security technician was there installing more cameras, so I felt the need to clean the thick mess up in the guest bathroom, as not to embarrass the family. I am not like my siblings, I care about appearances, I am square, you always want to put your best face forward.

However, they are different; they let it all hang out. I did not make the mess, but you know, as a man, it is your job to take care of the house. Anyway, I blew up at a guy yesterday, who was teasing me because my hair got messy in the wind.

I told him about himself, I am sick of you people talking about me and my body and my hair, back off. Get a life. So I did not even go outside today because people are so annoying, or they are busy.

However, I did get my two hours of church in. The pastor says to have faith, but I am kind of scared. Living alone, and being single and not being rich can worry a guy, what is to come of my future?

I am not even really looking for anyone, I want a friend, but like I said, my life is not normal. Maybe I can just pretend it is and go out and have a little fun and see what happens. I look at people a lot differently now. I do not want them talking over my food.

And everyone loves a nice butt, but after seeing that mess in the bathroom, I am so disgusted. I had to put a towel over my face just to clean the restroom without throwing up. Now I am sitting here thinking about my hair, I am tired of all of the fuss over it, I want to cut it off.

Then, as I am sitting here typing, I wonder…why do perfectly normal people waste so many hours of their lives on  social media? You guys have family, friends, children, social clubs, and spouses. So why spend countless hours of your day typing to people you may never see? Why not enjoy the people in your life?

What if one day you wake up and have no one, but social media and the news, what kind of life would that be?  Another thing that is on my mind is fried  chicken, I just cannot see to do it right.

An employer owes a good workman something beyond the wages paid, and a workman owes a good employer something beyond work done. Every person’s work is a portrait of oneself. Andreas Lubitz (age 27), the pilot of Germanwings Flight 9525, intentionally crashed the air plane, killing all 150 people on board, had a mental problem and was given a doctor’s note telling him not to report to work that day. However, Andreas ignored the physician’s orders and went to work anyway because he wanted to destroy the aircraft. When the other pilot on the plane left the cockpit, Andreas Lubitz took advantage of the moment and activated the descent, which can only be deliberately done, taking the craft from 38,000 feet to 100 feet, as passengers were screaming in terror for their lives, and deliberated crashed the plane into the French Alps, murdering all 150 innocent people on board. The pilot had normal interactions during the beginning of the flight, and them he just lost his mind, all of the sudden.

With society becoming so violent and so many innocent people being killed by others with mental problems, mental health needs to be addressed. There is a person called Kenny Holmes, he is a former employee of CBS13, in Sacramento, California and now works for NBCLA, in Los Angeles, California, and he has a serious mental problem. I used to be a fan of Kenny Holmes, and he asked me to buy him a pair of expensive basketball shoes for his birthday, so I did and sent them to him via Federal Express. The shoes and the shipping cost about $240.00. However, even before the shoes got to Kenny Holmes, on Saturday 1 June 2013, at about 10.15pm, I opened my front door to see Kenny Holmes sitting by my door. I was a little alarmed because the shoes were not to be delivered until Monday 3 June 2013, and I did not give Kenny Holmes my address. Kenny Holmes then found me online and started spreading rumors about me, saying I was a girl and that I had a period and calling me a demon. However, he did not stop there.

Kenny Holmes got his other young reporter friends to block me online and make fun of me also.  He also started calling me a demon and claimed that he is God. This went on for years and no one did anything to stop him. Then on several occasions, Kenny Holmes was seen hanging out in front of my apartment building in Sacramento, although he lives in Los Angeles.  On another occasion, Kenny Holmes somehow found me while I was out and was dancing by my car and started to approach it before I drove off. Most recently, Kenny Holmes was actually in my apartment changing the locks to the door. Nonetheless, Kenny Holmes talked about me so badly that someone pushed me to the ground and sodomized me to see if I was a real man. After that, I went to the doctor because I was in so much pain and found out that my spine had been fractured in two places. I was upset, so I contacted the Better Business Bureau because if nothing else, I at least wanted my money back.

However, instead of sending me a check for the price of the shoes and the shipping, Kenny Holmes had Nestor Barreror, the Vice President of Employment Law for NBCUniversal send me a letter threatening to have me arrested and sue me. Now, this is not right because Kenny Holmes is a public figure, and I am a private citizen, I was a fan, and I did not know it is against the rules for reporters to take gifts from fans. However, my concern is that Kenny Holmes and his employers bullied me, and they know that Kenny Holmes has been harassing and physically stalking me and that I have gotten hurt more than once because of the rumors he made up about me, I was also straggled. With the Germanwings situation, I think that Kenny Holmes needs to undergo a mental evaluation, if not termination, because his behavior is not typical and he could go on to seriously hurt others. After all, Kenny Holmes thinks he is a God and believes he is talking to demons, which tells you that something is wrong with him, he is mentally unstable.

I was a virgin before I was sexually assaulted and now I have to live the rest of my life with a fractured spine, and that is not fair. Also my reputation has been damaged, by Kenny Holmes, who is a public figure, when I am a private citizen and I believe that NBC needs to do something to make up for what Kenny Holmes did.  It is absurd that a professional is allowed to run around with physical impurity, reveling vice as his native habit. This is an issue of justice. I report these things now because I have serious concerns that Kenny Holmes may try something else in the future or hurt another innocent person, as he has a prosaically poor and is ridiculously insistent on the reality of his fantasies and cannot grasp his greed and grasping selfishness.