The fastest way to succeed is to look as if you are playing by other people’s rules, while quietly playing by your own. The spiritual counsellor who takes personal advantage of the dependence placed upon one or of the trust shown in one, thereby renders oneself unfit for such a high position. Therefore in one’s dealing with disciples it is best for one to maintain an independence in practical affairs and Worldly relationship as well as a cool detachment in social contact and personal intercourse. It is inevitable that the disciples should feel hurt at such impersonality and such objectivity, but therein lies a protection both for themselves and for the teacher until such time as they are more developed, better balanced, more controlled, and farther seeing. Then and then only is it possible for the teacher to revise the relationship and make it not only a warmer one but even a more personal one, with safety to both sides. Disciples who are not well-balanced and are somewhat neurotic often try to get the teacher personally involved in their lives. For they want to be set free from the need of developing themselves, the duty of improving their characters, the burden of accepting their responsibilities, and the painfulness of working out emotional problems which are merely the result of their own egoism. #RandolphHarris 1 of 21

If the teacher succumbs to their appeals, then they remain unevolved and the relationship itself remains unpracticable. However, if one firmly resists them one may, by such resistance, force a change in their attitude and consequently an increase in their wisdom. In doing so however one courts misunderstanding on the part of one’s disciples, who may first become bewildered and later resentful. Affection may turn to anger for a time, and the disciple may even withdraw altogether. If they are so foolish as to do this their development will not only be stopped but also, what is worse, set back for months or years. It is also an error to believe that one disciple must necessarily associate with the other disciples of the same teacher. Only where there is real temperamental harmony and personal affinity should disciples associate together. Where these are lacking, it is much wiser and safer not to do so. For then the evil forces take advantage of the chance to develop disharmony, quarrels, ill-feeling, and even worse. This spoils the progress of both. The real business of any disciple is with the teacher, not with the other disciples. Such a situation cannot be helped and must be accepted. Human beings are all born with different characters and dispositions. Only the self-actualized can harmonize with all; other must recognize limitations. #RandolphHarris 2 of 21

If one cannot be happy with certain students, one must wish them well and then go one’s own way. One must never allow oneself to be drawn into quarrels for then the evil forces become active. The relationship between them is a beautiful but free one. If the disciple takes a possessive attitude and tries to annex the teacher, if one betrays jealousy of other disciples or demands as much attention as they get, one substitutes an egotistic for an impersonal relationship, fails to understand its distinctively and uniquely free nature, and thus spoils it. One must insist on getting the same freedom from one’s disciples that one allows to them. Whether physically together or physically apart, that is a true relationship between master and disciple, husband and wife, friend and friend, which refusing to be tightly possessive or personally demanding, is satisfied by the silent fact that the other exists at all.  If one is attached to the role as an authority figure, no self-actualized can lead anyone to enlightenment, nor can any disciple ever receive enlightenment if one wants to play the role of disciple forever. Both are suffering from attachments which prevent enlightenment. This is why the whole thing becomes a stage play, whether serious or comical, in which the actors are performing their personal parts. #RandolphHarris 3 of 21

Even if they babble about the necessity of not getting attached to the World, they are still attached to what they are supposed to be, that is, questing. A truly enlightened human has no such attachment and unless one is invested by God with a special apostleship, or with a special mission, one would not consider oneself self-actualized, nor anyone else as a disciple. Listening to feelings and reflecting them is a vastly complex process. Research evidence has kept piling up, and it points strongly to the conclusions that a high degree of empathy in a relationship is possibly the most potent factor in bringing about change and learning. And so I believe it is time for me to forget the caricatures and misrepresentations of the past and take a fresh look at empathy. For still another reason it seems timely to do this. In the United States of America during the past decade or two, many new approached to therapy have held center stage. Gestalt therapy, psychodrama, primal therapy, bioenergetics, rational-emotive therapy, and transactional analysis are some of the best known, but there are more. Part of their appeal lies in the fact that in most instances, the therapist is clearly the expert, actively manipulating the situation, often in dramatic ways, for the client’s benefit. If I am reading the signs correctly, I believe there is a decrease in the fascination with such expertise in guidance. #RandolphHarris 4 of 21

With behaviour therapy, another approach based on expertise, I believe interest and fascination are still on the increase. A technological society has been delighted to have found a technology by which people’s behaviour can be shaped, even without their knowledge or approval, towards goals selected by their therapists or by society. Yet even in this case, much questioning by thoughtful individuals is springing up as the philosophical and political implications of “behaviour mod” become more clearly visible. So I have seen a willingness on the part of people that locate power in the person, no the expert, and this brings me again to examine carefully what is meant by the term “empathy” and what we have come to know about it. Perhaps the time is ripe for its value to be appreciated. The sate of empathy, or being empathic, is to perceive the internal frame of reference of another with accuracy and with the emotional components and meanings which pertain thereto as if one were the person, but without every losing the “as if” condition. Thus is means to sense the hurt or the pleasure of another as one senses it and to perceive the causes thereof as one perceives them, but without ever losing the recognition that it is as if I were hurt or pleased and so forth. If this “as if” quality is lost, then the state if one of identification. #RandolphHarris 5 of 21

With the concept of experiencing, at all times there is going on in the human organism a flow of experiencings to which the individual can turn again and again as a referent in order to discover the meaning of those experiences. An empathic therapist points sensitively to the “felt meaning” which the client is experiencing in this particular moment, in order to help one to focus on that meaning and carry it further to its full and uninhibited experiencing. An example may clarify both the concept and its relation to empathy. A person in an encounter group has been making vague negative statements about his father. The facilitator says, “It sounds as though you might be angry at your father.” The man replies, “No, I do not think so.” “Possibly dissatisfied with him?” “Well, yes, perhaps” (said rather doubtfully). “Maybe you are disappointed in him.” Quickly the man responds, “That is it! I am disappointed that he is not a strong person. I think I have always been disappointed in him ever since I was a boy.” Against what is the man checking these terms for their correctness? Well, he is checking them against the ongoing psychophysiological flow within himself to see if they fit. This flow is a very real thing, and people are able to use it as a referent. In this case, “angry” does no match the felt meaning at all; “dissatisfied” comes closer, but is not really correct; “disappointed” matches it exactly, and encourages a further flow of the experiencing, as often happens. #RandolphHarris 6 of 21

With this conceptual background, let me attempt a description of empathy that would seem satisfactory to me today. I would no longer be terming it a “state of empathy,” because I believe it to be a process, rather than a state. Perhaps I can capture that quality. An empathic way of being with another person has several facets. It means entering the private perceptual World of the other and becoming thoroughly at home in it. It involves being sensitive, moment by moment, to the changing felt meanings which flow in this other person, to the fear or rage or tenderness of confusion or whatever one is experiencing. It means temporarily living in the other’s life, moving about in it delicately without making judgments; it means sensing meanings of which one is scarcely aware, but not trying to uncover totally unconscious feelings, since this would be too threatening. It includes communicating your sensing of the person’s World as you look with fresh and unfrightened eyes a elements of which one is fearful. It means frequently checking with the person as to the accuracy of your sensings, and being guided by the responses you receive. You are a confident companion to the person in one’s inner World. By pointing to the possible meanings in the flow of another person’s experiencing, you help the other to focus on this useful type of referent, to experience the meanings more fully, and to move forward in the experiencing. #RandolphHarris 7 of 21

To be with another in this way means that for the time being, you lay aside your own views and values in order to enter another’s World without prejudice. In some sense it means that you law aside your self; this can only be done by persons who are secure enough in themselves that they know they will not get lost in what may turn out to be the strange or bizarre World of the other, and that they can comfortably return to their own World when they wish. Perhaps this description makes clear that being empathic is a complex, demanding, and strong—yet also subtle and gentle—way of being. In operational empathy, one appreciates what your experience feels like to you. One understands what you say from a detached, objective point of view. One understands your words but not the way you feel. Qualitatively it (empathic understanding) is an active process of desiring to know the full, present and changing awareness of another person, of reaching out to receive one’s communication and meaning, and of translating one’s words and signs into experienced meaning that matches at least those aspects of one’s awareness that are most important to one at the moment. It is an experiencing of the consciousness “behind” another’s outward communication, but with continuous awareness that this consciousness is originating and proceeding in the other. #RandolphHarris 8 of 21

Then there is the Accurate Empathy Scale, devised by Truax (1967) an others for use by raters. Even small portions of recorded interviews can be reliably rated by this scale. The nature of the scale may be indicated by giving the definition of Stage 1, which is the lowest level of empathic understanding, and Stage 8, which is a very high (though not the highest) degree of empathy. Here is Stage 1: Therapist seems completely unaware of even the most conspicuous of the client’s feelings. One’s responses are not appropriate to the mood and content of the client’s statements and there is no determinable quality of empathy, hence, no accuracy whatsoever. Therapist may be bored and disinterested or actively offering advice, but one is not communicating an awareness of client’s current feelings. Stage 8 is defined as follows: Therapist accurately interprets all the client’s present acknowledged feelings. One also uncovers the most deeply shrouded of the client’s feeling areas, voicing meanings in the client’s experience of which the client is scarcely aware. One moves into feelings and experiences that are only hinted at by the client and does so with sensitivity and accuracy. The content that comes to life maybe new but is not alien. While the therapist in Stage 8 makes mistakes, mistakes do not have a jarring note but are covered by the tentative character of the response. #RandolphHarris 9 of 21

Also the therapist is sensitive to one’s mistakes and quickly alters or changes one’s responses in midstream, indicating that one more clearly knows what is being talked about and what is being sought after in the client’s own explorations. The therapist reflects a togetherness with the [client] in tentative trial and error exploration. One’s voice tone reflects the seriousness and depth of one’s empathic grasp. Although what is indicated by these examples is that the empathic process can be defined in theoretical, conceptual, subjective, and operational ways, but we have not reached the limits of its base. We have developed a helping-community enterprise called “Changes,” which has many implications for dealing with the alienated and counter-culture members of the chaos which we called living. Of particular interest is the “Rap Manual,” which has been developed to assist the ordinary person in learning “how to help with the other person’s process.” Then Manual starts out with a section on “Absolute Listening.” Some excerpts give the flavour: This is not laying trips on people. You only listen and say back the other person’s thing, step by step, just as that person seems to have it at that moment. You never mix into it any of your own things or ideas, never lay on the other person anything that person did not express. #RandolphHarris 10 of 21

To show that you understand exactly, make a sentence or two which gets exactly at the personal meaning this person wanted to put across. This might be in your own words, usually, but use that person’s own words for the touchy main things. The explanation continues in this same vein, with many detailed suggestions, including ideas on “how to know when you are doing it right.” So it seems clear that an empathic way of being, although highly subtle conceptually, can also be described in terms which are perfectly understandable by contemporary youth or citizens of a beleaguered inner city. It is a broad-ranging conception. And now let us consider our existence, and the knowledge that we possess. Paul says that all our present knowledge is like the perception of things in a mirror, that it therefore concerns enigmas and riddles. This is only another way of expressing the fragmentary character of our knowledge. For fragments out of the context of the whole are only riddles to us. We may surmise the nature of the whole; we may approach the whole indirectly; but we do not see the whole itself; we do not grasp it directly face to face. A little light and much darkness; a few fragments and never the whole; many problems and never a solution; only reflections in the mirrors of our souls, without the source of truth itself: that is the situation of our knowledge. And it is the situation of our love.  #RandolphHarris 11 of 21

Because of the love which is perfect and lasting lies not within us, perfect knowledge is denied us. Since, as beings, we are separated from each other, and therefore from this ultimate unity, the community of knowledge among single beings is made impossible, as it is also, then, between beings and the Ground of Being Itself. A great philosopher has said that our knowledge reaches as far as our creative will reaches. That is true for a certain realm of life. However, it is not true for the whole of our life. The fact that our knowledge reaches as far as our uniting love reaches is valid for the whole human existence. Humankind has always tried to decipher the puzzling fragments of life. That attempt is not just a matter for the philosophers or priests or prophets or wise humans in all periods of history. It is a matter for everyone. For every human is a fragment oneself. One is a riddle to oneself; and the individual life of everyone else is an enigma to one, dark, puzzling, embarrassing, exciting, and torturing. Our very being is a continuous asking for the meaning of our being, a continuous attempt to decipher the enigma of our World and our heart. Before children are adjusted to the conventional reactions of adults and have grown out of their creative individuality, they show the continuous asking, the urgent desire to decipher the riddles they see in the primitive mirror of their experiences. #RandolphHarris 12 of 21

The creative human, in all realms of life, is like a child, who dares to inquire beyond the limits of conventional answers. One discovers the fragmentary character of all these answers, a character darkly and subconsciously felt by all humans. One may destroy, by means of one fundamental question, a whole, well-organized system of life and society, of ethics ad religion. One may show that what people believed to be a whole is nothing but a fragment of a fragment. One may shake the certainty on which centuries lived, by unearthing a riddle or an enigma in its very foundation. The misery of humans lies in the fragmentary character of one’s life and knowledge; the greatness of humans lies in one’s ability to know that one’s being is fragmentary and enigmatic. For humans are able to be puzzled and to ask, to go beyond the fragments, seeking the perfect. Yet, in being able to do so, one feels at the same time the tragedy implicit in one’s being, the tragedy of the riddle and the fragment. Humans are subject, with all beings, to the law of vanity. However, humans alone are conscious of that one. One is therefore infinitely more miserable than all other beings in the servitude to that law; on the other hand, one is infinitely superior, because one alone knows that there is something beyond vanity and decay, beyond riddles and enigmas. #RandolphHarris 13 of 21

That statement is felt by Paul when he says that the creation itself shall be delivered from the bondage of decay into the liberty of the glory of the children of God. Humans are fragments and riddles to themselves. The more one experiences and knows that fact, the more one is really human. Paul experienced the breakdown of a system of life and thought which one believed to be a whole, a perfect truth without riddle or gaps. One then found oneself buried under the pieces of one’s knowledge and one’s morals. However, Paul never tried again to build up a new, comfortable house out of the pieces. One dwelt with the pieces. One realized always that fragment remain fragments, even if one attempts to reorganize them. The unity to which they belong lies beyond them; it is grasped through hope, but not face to face. How could Paul endure life, as it lay in fragments? He endured it because the fragments bore a new meaning to him. The pictures in the mirror pointed to something new for one: they anticipated the perfect, the reality of love. Through the pieces of one’s knowledge and morality, love appeared to one. And the power of love transformed the tormenting riddles into symbols of truth, the tragic fragments into symbols of the whole. #RandolphHarris 14 of 21

When we pray, we talk to divine beings. They are our spiritual friends, guardians Angels, God, Jesus Christ, the Holy Ghost, or parents, or cousins. We talk to our human friends and parents and cousins, so it only makes sense to talk to their divine counterparts as well. The most common form of prayer is purification. With the power of the sea, that washes the shores, I am purified. May I be pure, may all my impurities be burned away, carried away by the grace of God. May I be pure, fit to approach God. I am encircled with the sacred, girded about, encompassed, that my actions here today might be within the sacred way. The sacred covers me, I am surrounded by the pure. God, I offer you my worship. Watch over me today as I go about my affairs; keep me safe, keep me happy, keep me healthy. God of truth, be with me today. As I wear your blessings, guard my words and deeds. May what I say and what I do be in accord with your sacred law. The elements are joined with the power of spirit. May I be blessed by the four. May I be blessed by your spirit. May I be blessed my you only Begotten Son. “And it came to pass after he had made an end of speaking unto the people many of them did believe on one’s words, and began to repent, and to search the scriptures. #RandolphHarris 15 of 21

“However, the more part of them were desirous that they might destroy Alma an Amulek; for they were angry with Alma, because of the plainness of his words unto Zeezrom; and they also said that Amulek had lied unto them, and had reviled against their law and also against their lawyers and judges. And they were also angry with Alma and Amulek; and because they had testified so plainly against their wickedness, they sought to put the away privily. However, it came to pass that they did not; but they took them and bound the with strong cords, and took them before the chief judge of the land. And the people went forth and witnessed against them—testifying that they had reviled against the law, and their lawyers and judges of the land, and also of all the people that were in the land; an also testified that there was but one God, and that he should send his Son among the people, but he should not save them; and many such things did the people testify against Alma and Amulek. Now this was done before the chief judge of the land. And it came to pass that Zeezrom was astonished at the words which had been spoken; and one also knew concerning the blindness of the minds, which one had caused among the people by one’s lying words; and one’s soul began to be harrowed up under a consciousness of one’s own guilt; yea, one began to be encircled about by the pains of hell. #RandolphHarris 16 of 21

“And it came to pass that one began to cry unto the people, saying: Behold, I am guilty, and these men are spotless before God. And he began to plead for them from that time forth; but they reviled one saying: Art thou also possessed with the devil? And they spit upon one, and cast one out from among them, and also all those who believed in the words which had been spoken by Alma and Amulek; and they cast them out, and sent humans to cast stones at them. And they brought their wives and children together, and whosoever believed or had been taught to believe in the word of God they caused that they should be cast into the fire; and they also brought forth their records which contained the holy scriptures, and cast them into the fire also, that they might be burned and destroyed by fire. And it came to pass that they took Alma and Amulek, and carried them forth to the place of martyrdom, that they might witness the destruction of those who were consumed by fire. And when Amulek saw the pains of the woman and children who were consuming in the fire, he also was pained; and he said unto Alma: How can we witness this awful scene? Therefore let us stretch forth our hands, and exercise the power of God which is in us, and save them from the flames. #RandolphHarris 17 of 21

“However, Alma said unto him: The Spirit constraineth me that I must not stretch forth mine hand; for behold the Lord recieveth them up unto himself, in glory; and he doth suffer that they may do this thing, or that the people may do this thing unto them, according to the hardness of their hearts, that the judgements which he shall exercise upon them in his wrath may be just; and the blood of the innocent shall stand as a witness against them, yea, and cry mightily against them at the last day. Now Amulek said unto Alma: Behold, perhaps they will burn us also. And Alma said: Be it according to the will of the Lord. However, behold, our work is not finished; therefore they burn us no. Now it came to pass that when the bodies of those who had been cast into fire were consumed, and also the records which were cast in with them, the chief judge f the land came and stood before Alma and Amulek, as they were bound; and he smote the with his hand upon their cheeks, and said unto them: After what ye have seen will ye preach again unto this people, that they shall be cast into a lake of fire and brimstone? Behold, ye see that ye had not power to save those who had been cast into the fire; neither has God saved them because they were of Thy faith. And the judges smote them again upon their cheeks, and asked: What say ye for yourselves? #RandolphHarris 18 of 21

“Now this judge was after the order and faith of Nehor, who slew Gideon. And it came to pass that Alma and Amulek answered him nothing; and he smote them again, and delivered them to the officers to be cast into prison. And when they had been cast into prison three days, there came many lawyers, and judges, and priests, and teachers, who were of the profession of Nehor; and they came in unto prison to see them, and they questioned them about many words; but they answered them nothing. And it came to pass that the judge stood before them, and said: Why do ye not answer the words of this people? Know ye not that I have power to deliver you up unto the flames? And he commanded them to speak; but they answered nothing. And it came to pass that they departed and went their ways, but came again on the morrow; and the judge also smoke them again on their cheeks. And many came forth also, and smote them, saying: Will ye stand again and judge this people, and condemn our law? If ye have such great power why do ye not deliver yourselves? And many such things did they say unto them, gnashing their teeth upon them, and spitting upon them, and saying: How shall we look when we are damned? And many such things, yea, all manner of such things did they say unto them; and thus they did mock them for many days. #RandolphHarris 19 of 21

“And they did withhold food from them that they might hunger, and water that they might thirst; and they also did take from them their clothes that there were naked; and thus they were bound with strong cords, and confined in prison. And it came to pass after they had thus suffered for many days, (and it was on the twelfth day, in the tenth month, in the tenth year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi) that the chief judge over the land of Ammonihah and many of their teachers and their lawyers went in unto the prison where Alma and Amulek were bound with cords. And the chief judge stood before them, and smote them again, and said unto them: If ye have the power of God deliver yourselves from the bands, and then we will believe that the Lord will destroy this people accord to your words. And it came to pass that they all went forth and smote them, saying the same words, even until the last; and when the last had spoken unto them the power of God was upon Alma and Amulek, and they rose and stood upon their feet. And Alma cried, saying: How long shall we suffer these great afflictions, O Lord? O Lord, give us strength according to our faith which is in Christ, even unto deliverance. And they broke the cords with which they were bound; and when the people saw this, they began to flee, for the fear of destruction had come upon them. #RandolphHarris 20 of 21

“And it came to pass that so great was their fear that they feel to the Earth, and did not obtain the outer door of the prison; and the Earth shook mightily, and the walls of the prison were rent in twain, so that they fell to the Earth; and the chief judge, and the lawyers, and priests, and teachers, who smoke upon Alma and Amulek, were slain by the fall thereof. And Alma and Amulek came for the out of the prison, and they were not hurt; for the Lord had granted unto them power, according to their faith which was in Christ. And they straightway came forth out of the prison; and they were loosed from their bands; and the prison had fallen to the Earth, and every soul within the walks therefore, save it were Alma an Amulek, was slain; and they straightway came forth into the city. Now the people having heard a great noise came running together by multitudes to know the cause of it; and when they saw Alma and Amulek coming forth out of the prison, and the walls thereof had fallen to the Earth, they were struck with great fear, and fled from the presence of Alma and Amulek even as a goat fleeth with her young from two lions; and thus they did flee from the presence of Alma and Amulek,” reports Alma 14.1-29. Rejoicing, O Lord, in the richness of Thy gifts, we humbly pray that as Thou hast given us power to hold this ministry, so Thou wilt give us sufficient grace to fulfil it; through our Lord. Amen. #RandolphHarris 21 of 21

For breakfast, lunch, dinner, and all the snacks in-between—you spend lots of time in the kitchen, so we make sure ours are beautiful from every angle. 😍 https://cresleigh.com/cresleigh-meadows-at-plumas-ranch/residence-4/
How goodly are your tents, O Jacob, your dwelling places, O Israel. O Lord, through Thine abundant kindness I come into Thy house, ad reverently I worship Thee in Thy holy sanctuary. I love the habitation of Thy house, the place where Thy glory dwelleth. Here I bow down and worship Thee, my Lord and Maker. Accept my prayer, O Lord, and answer me with Thy great mercy and with Thy saying truth. Amen.

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