Home » Posts tagged 'relationships' (Page 6)
Tag Archives: relationships
Closer to the Hearts Desire–Be Still My Soul, Be Still; the Arms You Bear are Strong!
They brought me into the house. It was bright and magnificent. They showed me the sunny double parlor with its craved archway and shining floors and they took me through the handsome dining room with its murals of the Winchester Mansion. People in Graystone Hills, in general, are inconsistent in the way they talk and act with reference to the idea of classes. If they are asked bluntly, “Do you believe there are ‘classes’ in the community?” they are very likely to say, “No.” Yet, they will tell you the Hiltons are “a leading family here,” or the “Hearsts are like the Hiltons, and Rothschild, and Winchesters. These families are different from the rest of us; they are exclusive. I guess you would call them our aristocracy.” During the course of the conversation, the same speaker will say that there are several different “types of families” in the community and, justifying one’s judgment by describing the “way they live,” place them in different categories. The democratic tradition that there are no classes in American society is the reason for this type of behavior. Therefore, the people in Graystone Hills deny the existence of class directly but act as if classes exist. However, many beings in Graystone Hills openly say that there are three classes in the community—“upper,” “middle,” and “less affluent”—but when they are requested to name persons in, let us say the “less affluent class” they generally divide the class into the “good” lower class people and the “worthless, ne’er-do-wells.” #RandolphHarris 1 of 17
The same kind of break appears in the “middle class.” Separation of the “middle class” into “upper middle” and “lower middle” is quite conventional. Even though people in Graystone Hills are inconsistent in their designations of a particular class, the systematic analysis of selected cultural traits associated with each of the five classes, based upon data collected from the 535 families of the adolescents, supplemented by interviews and observations, reveal that the possession of a constellation of differentially evaluated social symbols—functional, pecuniary, religious, educational, reputational, power, lineage, proper associates, memberships in associations—are relied up by Graystone Hills to “hang people on the peg they belong on,” to determine “their place in the community” or “their standing in life.” Class V occupies the lowest-ranking stations in the prestige structure. It is looked upon as the scum of the city by the higher classes. It is believed generally that nothing beyond charity can be done for these people, and only a minimum of that is justified since they show little or no inclination to help themselves. It is the opinion of the upper classes that: “They have no respect for themselves. They enjoy their shacks and huts along the river or across the tracks and love their dirty, smoky, low-class dives and taverns. #RandolphHarris 2 of 17
“Whole families—children, in-laws, mistresses, and all—live in one shack. This is the crime class that produces the delinquency and sexual promiscuity that fills the paper. Their interests lie in pleasures of the flesh and its perversion. The girls are always with child; the families are huge; incestual relations occur frequently. They are not inspired by education, and only a few are able to make any attainments along this line. They are loud in their speech, vulgar in their actions, sloppy in their dress, and indifferent toward their plight. Their vocabulary develops as profanity is learned. If they work, the work at very menial jobs. Their life experiences are purely physical, and even these are on a low plane. They have no interests in health and medical care. Then men are too lazy to work or do odd jobs around town. They support the Democratic party because of the relief obtained during the depression. This groups lives for a Saturday of drinking or fighting. They are of low character and breed and have a criminal record for a pedigree.” Class V persons, passive and fatalistic, realize that they are “on the bottom” and believe that they can do nothing to improve their position. They desire money, possessions, education, and favorable prestige, but they do not know how these are achieved. #RandolphHarris 3 of 17
When a class V persons attempts to improve one’s position, one is discriminated against by the higher classes, and by many members of one’s own class who think one is trying to “put on airs.” One woman with considerable insight into her class position summarized it thus: “Survival for us depends on staying on good terms with the rich people and the law. Whenever I think about myself and the kids, I am reminded what my father used to say, ‘We are the ones who are told what to do, when and how’ around here. This town takes us for granted. Most people think the people down here [the tannery flats] are too ignorant to do anything and do not care; I guess they are right.” To generalize a little more, class V persons give the impression of being resigned to a life of frustration and defeat in a community that despises them for their disregard of morals, lack of “success” goals, and dire poverty. Family support comes from many sources. The father is the chief breadwinner in three families out of five, but his earnings are meager. Ninety-two percent are unskilled and semi-skilled laborers or machine operators. Not one is a farm owner, and only 8 are farm tenants; 2 are notions salesmen; and 8 operate very small businesses, such as hauling coal from local mines, ash and trash hauling, repair and sales of old cars. #RandolphHarris 4 of 17
Fifty-five percent of the mothers in class V “work out” part time or full time as waitresses, dishwashers, cooks, washwomen, janitresses, cleaning women, and unskilled domestic workers. Many younger women and girls work on the production line of a local manufacturer who is reputed to give them preference in his shops because they can be hired for lower wages than class IV workers. Income from wages provides them with enough money to obtain the most meager necessities of life; however, in many cases it is inadequate even for his, and they rely upon private charity and public relief. Annual family income ranges from $15,365 to high of $24,934. The modal income fell in the $18,572 to $18,958 bracket. (Whereas the median income in Rocklin, California is $84,121 and the median income in Oak Park, California is $121,721). Income varies from year to year, depending upon your work conditions and wages. Between 2017 and 2019, the private earnings of 53 percent of these families were supplemented by township relief during at least one-fourth of each year. This figure does not take into consideration federal subsidies, such as Works Progress Administration (WPA) and National Youth Administration (NYA), which prevailed in that period; neither does it include private charity in the form of “outfitting the children” with clothes. Gifts of partially worn-out clothing, linens, bedding, old furniture, dishes, and food are a regular part of the private relief and indirect wage system supported by the two highest classes and to some extent by class III. #RandolphHarris 5 of 17
These gifts are given informally to persons who preform domestic service for donors. Begging by class V’s is frowned upon strongly; consequently, needy families do not solicit things in an overt manner, but any class V persons knows how to make his or her wants known to an employer in a humble, discreet manner that generally brings the desired results. Semipublic charity is dispensed through sewing circles, guilds, and clubs that make clothing for infants. The ever-popular rummage sale, one of which is held almost every Saturday by some “middle-class” organization, may be viewed as another form of charity to the lower classes. Many class V women regularly buy their family’s best clothes from these sales. As one class II woman said, “This year, Mrs. Gordon Sweitzer [class I] will have a striking dress, next year you will see it on Mrs. Luke Jenkins [class IV] in the Baptist choir, and three years from now Pearl Soper [class V] will be trying to catch some loafer’s eye with it.” Bank credit is non-existent, and even the small-loan broker has learned through experience to be careful with class V: “Before I loan one of them a cent, I investigate carefully and make sure they own what they put up for security. There is not a person in that class who has not been in here one time of another for a loan. #RandolphHarris 6 of 17
“If they have a job and can give me good evidence they can pay back a loan, I will give them from $100 to $250 at first. If they pay it back, just as they agree to, I will let them have a little more next time. Eighty percent of the loans I have written off were made to the class represented by the names you have there. [A group of class V’s we were checking for loans.] Exactly one-half of the class V families studied have procured small personal loans, none over $500; this is the limit the broker will loan to persons he or she does not believe to be “good risks.” Repeated loans to the class V’s are discouraged; the mean is eight loans per family for those who manage to obtain them. On the other hand, the broker encourages class IV’s to borrow time after time, since one considers them “good risks.” The uncertain nature of their employment results in long periods of idleness, you often see them sitting on the front porch or on a bench as if they are waiting for a ride or a bus that never comes; also illness, real or imagined, may result in a voluntary layoff for a few days that, to persons in the higher classes, appears to be laziness. Whatever conditioning factors, these people are far more irregular in their employment than the class IV’s. They will leave a job casually, often without notice, and for flimsy reasons. #RandolphHarris 7 of 17
Even then the class V’s are placed in the simplest menial jobs. The work history of a father or mother is generally known to employers, and one acts in the light of it when a son or daughter of one of these families asks one for employment. Therefore, prepare your journey and its integration with your soul. Know that the only comfort you will find is that which you have the strength to create and perceive yourself. This work will pour outward from within. Take record of the journey and examine it closely for it is the mirror reflecting the knowledge of your true self, along with all of its power and glory. It is very easy to cause self-destruction along the journey for there are many noses which seek to hang you. Even if you are in a place of eternal darkness, understand that you have a light within which cannot be dimmed. A light which is unlike any light perceived by those of lower consciousness. This light is the power of your own spirit, developed by your own intellect, spoken words, and chosen deeds within the realm of limitation. What we see as finite never is. Nothing is finite for the same exact reason nothing is infinite. Infinite existence would mean stasis and lack of consciousness, never moving forward in thought or maturity and never growing to expand in influence and in the responsibility of action. #RandolphHarris 8 of 17
The only difference between us and those of the more mundane nature is that we choose to consciously guide the process and flux of the chaos of darkness eternal. At this point we see the inadequacy of the concept commonly used in psychoanalytic circles to explain creativity—regression in the service of the ego. In my own endeavors to understand creative people in psychoanalysis and to understand the creative act in general, I find this theory unsatisfactory. This is not only because of its negative character, but chiefly because it proposes a partial solution that diverts us from the center of the creative act and therefore away from any full understanding of creativity. In supporting the theory of regression in the service of ego, creativity often seems to be a regressive phenomenon, and does bring out archaic, infantile, unconscious psychic contents in the artist. The rest—or regression—only serves to release the person from his or her intense efforts and the accompanying inhibitions, so that the creative impulse can have free rein to express itself. When the archaic elements in a poem or a picture or a film have genuine power to move others, and when they have a universality of meaning—that is, when they are genuine symbols—it is because some encounter is occurring on a more basic comprehensive level. #RandolphHarris 9 of 17
Eventually the Lord of Darkness will perish because this is the will of the Lord of Darkness. They are as weapons to be put away after the turmoil of war. When the greater work is complete and humanity, they will perish and he like human vessels will be liberated, and humanity will then be able to come to terms with their own power by taking responsibility for the nature of their existence. Civil disobedience does not serve our potential to thrive. Therefore, you will find yourself viewing news reports and the lies being told to you by the media, but instead of consuming it without question, you will directly perceive the agenda that hides behind them. Things fall apart; the center cannot hold; mere anarchy is loosed upon the World. What tremendous power this is. It is a new revelation, with beauty and how we will learn to resolve this terrible situation in which we modern human beings find ourselves. The reason some people have such power is that they come from a place of intensity of consciousness that includes archaic elements because they are part of them, as they are of every person, and will emerge in any intensely ware moment. However, the symbol has its power precisely from the fact that it is an encounter that also includes the most dedicated and passionate intellectual effort. It is important for us to be receptive, but by no stretch of the imagination passive. We cannot wait until the cry gathers of itself in one’s own throat. #RandolphHarris 10 of 17
Obviously, creative insights of all sorts come to us in moments of relaxation. They come not haphazardly, however, but come only in those areas in which we are intensively committed and on which we concentrate in our waking, conscious experience. It may be, as we have said, that the insights can break through only in moments of relaxation; but to say this is to describe how they come rather than to explain their genesis. Choose the moments in which you are capable of your highest, most intense consciousness. Bless be the Lord God of our father, which hath put such a thing as this in the king’s heart, to beautify the house of the Lord which is in Jerusalem. What must be understood here is that the principle of the dual nature of good and evil cease to exist altogether when the forces are applied in their proper context. All possible actions serve a great purpose under the right circumstances and within the proper context and so there are no absolutes such as good and evil. The nature of symbols and myths do bring into awareness infantile, archaic dreads, unconscious longings, and similar primitive psychic content. This is their regressive aspect. However, they also bring out new meaning, new forms, and disclose a reality that was literally not present before, a reality that is not merely subjective but has a second pole which is outside. #RandolphHarris 11 of 17
In other words it is the occult. It is human power and potential that is the crux of that which is hidden. This is the progressive side of symbol and myth. This aspect points ahead. It is integrative. It is progressive revealing of structure in our relation to nature and our own existence. Most will say that language was designed for the sole purpose of expressing the religious doctrine. The power of sound is what created the Universe according to the basis of most religions, and the priests knew the secrets of this power—power that syncs accumulated vibrational intentions of good speech. Language was used to worship energy accumulated (which is why people make “high energy” music like), controlled, and manipulated to shift the vibrational frequency of the environment. Languages are simply an ancient method of brain entertainment. This might seem outright foolish, however, this is a stone age application of the concepts used within the science of binaural beats and isochoric tones that are used today. We know that by the manipulation of sound frequencies, through measuring brainwaves our state of mind, including how receptive we are to ideas. Ideas can be planted directly into the mind as displayed through the craft of science of hypnotism which also depends upon the manipulation of brainswaves and this is why sirens like Aaliyah, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Emma Hewitt and Beyonce are so popular, their soft and seductive voices can put the audience in a state of trance. #RandolphHarris 12 of 17
Humankind is an emanation of raw, unadulterated and primal divine power that has been reduced to impotence because we are programmed to believe we must search for this power outside of self. This makes the power impotent because it is analogous to taking the fuel out of a care before starting the engine. We are programmed to believe in, and therefore sustain and fuel the limitation of our power to evolve and become something great. We are sovereign entities with unimaginable power and potential who have been enslaved by spiritual shackles. Seemingly casual words are vibrational emanations of our own dormant divine power. They vibrate according to our own individual level of personal will. Today our words lack power because they are used so frivolously without purpose or intent other than to take part in rather random conversations. It is not that conversation is bad. In fact, effectively relating to others is an important part of our life experience if the goal is to reunite with our eternal soul. This heightened consciousness, which we have identified as a characteristic of the encounter, the state in which the dichotomy between subjective experience and objective reality is overcome and symbols which reveal new meaning are born, is historically termed ecstasy. Like passion, ecstasy is a quality of emotion (or, more accurately, a quality of relationship one side of which is emotional) rather than a quantity. #RandolphHarris 13 of 17
Ecstasy is a temporary transcending of the subject-object dichotomy. It is interesting that is psychology we dodge that problem, Maslow’s work on the peak experience being a notable exception. Or, when we do speak of ecstasy we are implicitly pejorative or assume that it is neurotic. The experience of the encounter also brings with it anxiety. I need not remind you of the fear and trembling of artists and creative people in their moments of creative encounter. If not approached in the correct way, prayers, hymns, and devotions will create a very spiritually destructive atmosphere, and chance one’s vibration in a very destructive way if the chaos is not harnessed according to will with proper understanding of the principle of evil speech. Do not hide the agenda to simple mask the intent and power to enslave humankind behind the guise of an imposed definition of what is to be considered good by the herd. The subconscious mind can cause chaos within one’s reality by inverting these concepts due to predispositions and symbolic mental associations. I am impressed by Frank Barron’s studies of creative persons in art and science, for he shows them directly confronting their anxiety. Barron designated his “creative persons” as those who were recognized by their peers as having made distinguished contributions to their field. #RandolphHarris 14 of 17
Frank Barron showed them as well as a control group of “normal” people a series of Rorschachlike cards, some of which had orderly, systematic designs on them and others disorderly, unsymmetrical, and chaotic designs. The “normal” people selected the orderly, symmetrical cards as the designs they liked the most—they liked their Universe to be “in shape.” However, the creative persons selected the chaotic, disorderly cards—they found these more challenging and interesting. They could be like God in the Book of Genesis, creating order out of chaos. They chose the “broken” Universe; they got joy out of encountering it and forming it into order. They could accept the anxiety and use it in molding their disorderly Universe “closer to the heart’s desire.” According to the theory proposed here, anxiety is understandably a concomitant of the shaking of the self-World relationship that occurs in the encounter. Our sense of identity is threatened; the World is not as we experienced it before, and since self and World are always correlated, we no longer are what we were before. The anxiety we feel is temporary rootlessness, disorientation; it is the anxiety of nothingness. When these sonic spells are inverted you must keep in mind that it does not have to usher in sickness or anything of that sort, though it can be used that way to wield powers of baneful intent toward enemies. #RandolphHarris 15 of 17
Instead, understand that it is rather your right as a human being to seek out and develop good healthy through your actions and choices within the World. This is simple cause and effect which is at the root of the Universe. The obtainment of this logic then leads to empowerment to manifest change within your reality. Creative people, as I seem them, are distinguished by the fact that they can live with anxiety, even though a high price may be paid in terms of insecurity, sensitivity, and defenselessness for the gift of the “divine madness,” to borrow the terms used by the classical Greeks. They do not run away from non-being, but by encountering and wrestling with it, force it to produce being. They knock on silence for an answering music; they pursue meaninglessness until they can force it to mean. I am impelled by chaos to seek order, to struggle with it until I can find a deeper, underlying form. I am then struggling wit the meaninglessness and silence of the World until I can force it to mean, until I can make the silence answer and the non-being be. I can these use this peace for its authentic purpose—namely a deep relaxation of mind and body. Take your time with it, put forth effort to master it. You will find your own individual rhythm and hook into deep currents of power running through the deepest depths of self. #RandolphHarris 16 of 17
Channel your mental faculties to recite or memorize the words of power—such as love, joy, friendship, success, accomplish, blessing, advanced, balanced, beneficial, developed efficient, enhanced, innovated, excelled, promoted, refined, recovered, sustained, skilled, secured, saved, taught, trained. valued, validated, and so forth. It will eventually produce great power in the atmosphere of the temple area. These harmonic vibrations will break up the supposed natural order and so you must focus your intent to rebuild the reality you wish. Once your field of energy has been erased you may impose beauty upon the slate. The average human has an estimated 70,000 thoughts per day. Do you know how many of those thoughts are swayed by external forces? What if you were in control of each one of those thoughts? What would your reality be like at that point? To seek control of those thoughts is the premise and purpose of enlightenment. Learn to observe, question, and deconstruct your reality to come to your own personal conclusions. In the way you will start to engage higher spiritual consciousness. “Yea, we have reason to praise him forever, for his is the Most High God, and has loosed our brethren from the chains of hell. Yes, they were encircled about with everlasting darkness and destruction; but behold, he has brought them into his everlasting light, yea, into everlasting salvation; and they are encircled about with the matchless bounty of his love; yea, and we have been instruments in his hands of doing this great and marvelous work,” reports Alma 26.14-15. #RandolphHarris 17 of 17
Presenting… 🥁 Mills Station at Cresleigh Ranch! In this gorgeous floorplan, Residence 2 offers: ☑️ Open living spaces
☑️ Tons of natural light
☑️ Covered patio
☑️ Home hub
☑️ Upstairs loft
Stop by for a tour to see it for yourself!
https://cresleigh.com/mills-station/
#CresleighRanch
#RanchoCordova
#NewHomesForSale
#CresleighHomes
Sensory Rejuvenation Chamber
The World, being earnest itself, likes an earnest scene, and an earnest man, very well, but only in their place—the stage. Some people find it unbelievable that I have been celibate for my entire life, I have not had coitus, and do not even really date. The last time I even kissed someone was at a club back in 2009, and I came to and said to myself, “What am I doing?” The last time I went on a date was back in 2010, with a journalist or a doctor, I am not really sure who he is, and there is a long story behind that.
Every man loves in his soul to play the part of the stage deity. My friend and I had been drinking and we were wondering around midtown, and somehow who I ended up talk to this guy, he told me all about his new BMW 7 series, and I love BMWs. I knew it was like a $125,000.00 car and I did not want him to drive home. I ended up ditching my friend, and this guy and I got into his BMW, and he threw money at me, but I just let it fall on the floor. We listened pop music in the sensory rejuvenation chamber of the BMW, and then went to the burger joint and had a snack. It was about 2am, on a Saturday morning when we left, and he slept over.
We came back to my apartment, and I was a little embarrassed because there had recently been a major fire in the lobby, and there was black smoke on the walls and electrical wires hanging from the ceiling and some of the doors had been kicked down, by the fire department, to make sure there was no fire inside. My door to my apartment was one of them, and it did not even have a bottom door handle, just a lock and a cloth in the door to cover the hole where the door handle was supposed to go. So I knew this guy, because he was rich, would think this place was really weird and that it would reflect on me and would never want to see me again.
Anyway, as we were getting in bed, I turned on the radio, and he made me turn it off, he said, “People are trying to sleep.” He stripped down to his expensive tighty whities, I could tell they were expensive because they material was nice and thick, and laid in my bed on his back. I was so impressed with this guy because he was so clean. It was like he had just got out of the shower and knew he would see me. So anyway, he was about 5’9”, 135 pounds, blonde hair, blue eyes (if I am not mistaken), and it very good shape. I put on my pajamas and laid on his chest and hugged him all night, which felt really good.
Being celibate, I do not have much contact with people, and hugging this guy was like hugging a teddy bear, it made me feel good. The next morning, I gave him my number, walked him to his car, which he pretended he thought he left at the bar, but I am sure he remembered we parked in back, he said that he had “a screaming headache,” it was rainy, my hair was a mess, he got into his car, backed out, we waved and he drove away. I was sure I would never see him again because my apartment might not be up to his standards.
I am not sure if he ever called because the building was undergoing renovations, and my phone number changed, and I could not call him because I did not ask for his number. Months and possibly years went by, and I was in the supermarket, and this guy comes in and starts talking to this lady next to me (it was like one of those conversations where someone is trying to get your attention), but I ignored him. Then later on I realized it was the guy with the BMW and he was trying to get my attention.
So after a while, it dawned on me that I went on a date with a reporter because I saw him on the local TV news, and had kind of started dating one of his coworkers, which probably bothered him, but that did not work out anyway. We never even held hands. So anyway, I recently went to the doctor and my doctor also looks like the reporter that I went on a date with and I cannot figure out if they are the same person, but they are so similar.
So, this reporter and/or doctor, I have been talking to online and I save many of the news articles he writes—we are interested in a lot of the same subjects, and we connect online. However, I am kind of in love with someone else, and me and this reporter have not been interacting as much. Just a few days ago, I was wondering how he feels about that? And if he feels like I am manipulating him? And then I started getting that feeling like we broke up or something, but we are not even dating.
So basically, I am single and this person I am “in love with” seems to be getting kind of distant. And I am not really sure what I want? I would love to actually spend time with one of them and get to know them as friends. However, the guy with the BMW, I have never forgot about and I really like him because he seems honorable, whereas the other person kind of visits me, but is always out with other guys and women, and they take some very suggestive pictures. Like holding hands with other women, or taking pictures in a hotel room with another guy talking about they are “buckin.” So things are uncertain.
I confess, I seldom listen to the players on stage: one has so much to do, in looking about and finding out one’s acquaintances, that, really, one has no time to mind the stage. Some people think celibacy is bloody honorable. I have all of my parts and they function properly, but I decided I wanted I wanted to be fresh, not passed around, and wanted to wait to have sex until I was in a committed relationship. However, as I get older, I have desires, and while I am not desperate, I do want companionship and want to enjoy the company of another person.
The best actors cannot act well before empty benches. Because of religion reasons, I am not really even allowed to touch my own body, so if I masturbate, I cannot touch myself at all. And that is kind of sad because I put in a lot of work on my body and I really like the way it looks and feels. Men are faithful for so long only as temptations pass them by. Everybody like to be tempted. And, after all, it is very easy to resist temptation, if one wishes. And I am pretty sure it is the reporter who slept over because some of his coworkers have called me a journ-ho (because it seems to some that I only date reporters, and have been accused of sleeping with everyone in one newsroom). While some think celibacy is honorable, I am ready to have new experiences.
Some interesting things about celibacy, it is about going a prolonged time frame without sex, not just days, weeks, or months, but years, and possibly a lifetimes. I do not plan on being celibate a lifetime, but celibacy does have some benefits. For instance, you do not get any sexually transmitted infections. You are not exposed to bad sex or smelly people. There are not accidental pregnancies. And celibacy is reversible, you can choose to have sex whenever you want to. However, there are some downsides to being celibate also.
Most men think about sex 18 times a day, and women 9 times a day. The average adult has sex twice a week. So the issue with celibacy is your relationships are not real and you know the person you are interested in is actually having intercourse while you hold out. So celibacy kind of allows people to take advantage of you for you are not having sex, but may have feelings for a person, and they may have feelings for you, but since you are not sexually active, they can date you and other people and leave you on the side, while they have serial relationships. And they know you are not going anywhere because you have feelings for them.
Nonetheless, being that I have been celibate for so long and as corny as it sounds wanted to wait until marriage to have sex, as I get older my motivations change. I can say that I am more open to the idea of a casual relationship. I really would not mind just hooking up with a particular person just for a sexual relationship, no strings attached, until I meet someone I want to be with and someone who wants to be with me. The only reason I have not joined a dating website and hooked up with someone is because my parents will not allow it, it would deeply embarrass them.
Also, because I do not go out often and rarely go to nightclubs nor bars, I am not meeting anyone nor hooking up with any one. So being celibate means once you decide to break your celibacy, sexually, you are tainted, so people may lose interest in you. The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it, not everyone wants to feel sexless and isolated all of their lifetime, and if you are leaving someone who is celibate on hold, when you know they are waiting on, they may end up just indulging. A people think, well, this person is celibate or a virgin, they will wait on me as long as I want them to, but sometimes might find themselves been hurt.
For instance, a reference from popular culture is One Tree Hill, one of the characters was a virgin and in her early or late 20s, and she was dating this guy, Marvin, they were engaged to be married, and were waiting to have sex until their wedding day. However, Marvin could not wait and cheating on his fiance. She found out and went to a bar, got really drunk and had sex with another guy. Marvin found out and was hurt, not only because his future wife cheated on him, but also because she lost her virginity and he wanted to be her first.
What is a tender heart good for? Who can be happy that has a feeling heart? Personally, a lot of time has passed and I am tired of my heart being attached to people who seem to be enjoying themselves, and I think it would be so empowering to simply have a friend with benefits and no strings attached. So, that way, I can be out enjoying myself. Let us thank our lowliness, since it secures us from temptation. Scarcely any virtue is found to resist the power of long and pleasing lust.
Relationships are going to always be more difficult for someone who is celibate and less intimate. Sex is a way that couples feel closer to each other, and can bond themselves emotionally. Some people choose to be celibate so they do not mix love and friendship. However, after a young lifetime of celibacy, and heart break, your emotions change. And so, if you are loosely dating someone who is celibate, I hope you keep in mind that they want to be with you because they love you and are ready for intimacy. However, if you still want to play the field, realize you may lose them?
Who knows what will happen when that person is in a sexual relationship? If a person decided that they just want to have a relations specifically for intercourse, they may like it and decide to take on multiple partners, and may decide that love is not for them because their was no real connection when they were in love. The devil is an adversary, whom if we resist, he will fly far from us. However, I seldom resist him at all, from a terror that though I may conquer, I may still get a hurt in the combat–so I give up the triumph for security; and instead of thinking to make him fly, I generally fly myself. “Monogamy is the way to go, just put your lips together and blow.” -Britney Spears
I Know what you did Last Summer with those Secrets and Lies!
I know what you did last Summer is a cautionary urban legend that take place in North Carolina and is about what happened to four high school seniors, after they violated the Ten Commandments in the Bible. Berry Cox, Helen, Julie, and her boyfriend Ray go to a beach to celebrate the 4 July, in 1996. Helen was just crowned as she won a beauty pageant. As Julie, Ray, and Barry watch her get her crown, Ray comments on how big her breast are, and Barry tells him, “She does exercises to pump them up.” Ray and Julie are in a relationship, and Helen and Barry are in a relationship, and by talking about another man’s woman, Ray is committing adultery, which is a violation of the seventh commandment. Barry is a rich kid and has a brand new 1996 BMW 328i sedan, with factory chrome rims, leather, and tinted windows. The car is on fleek! While at the beach, Barry has a few drinks. This particular 4th of July is supposed to represent the Sabbath, although it takes place on Thursday, 4th July 1996, in the film. They are having fun and telling horror stories about a man being decapitated, and ended up with a bloody hook for a hand. Ray thinks these are true stories and explains that, “Urban legends are American folk lore, they all usually originate from some real incident!” The teens blow him off and Julie decided to lose her virginity to Ray. This is a violation of the fourth commandment of God, which states, “Honor the Sabbath day, and keep it holy” premarital sex is considered a sin.
After the night presses on, everyone is ready to leave, Barry’s friends do not want him to drive home, so his girlfriend Helen convinces him to let Ray, who has not been drinking, drive his brand-new BMW. However, Barry knows he is not supposed to let anyone drive his car, he even replies, “Nobody drives my car, but me.” The BMW is a phallic symbol and by letting Ray drive it, he is symbolically allowing himself to be castrated. Barry is also disrespecting his father, by allowing Ray to drive his car, which is a violation of the fifth commandment, which states, “Honor thy father and mother, and your days on this Earth will be long.” The teens should have called someone to pick them and the car up, as it was about a $60,000.00 car. As Ray is driving, Barry pops his head out of the sunroof, and they hit a man crossing the road, Barry gets blood all over his face. By driving Barry’s BMW, Ray, who is from a humble background, violates the second commandment, which states, “Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.” In this commandment, the Lord condemns the worship of idols Ray is worshipping Barry’s phallic symbol by driving a car that was not meant for him, and that is why he accidentally hits the man who was crossing the road.
The teens then get out of the car, Barry screams, “Jesus Christ, my fucking car! My dad is going to kill my ass.” Julie takes a few steps away from the car, finds a man’s rain boot, black in color, on the side of the road, she screams, “Oh my God! Oh my God! This isn’t happening!” Just then, Barry and Julie violate Commandment three, which states, “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord, thy God, in vain.” As the teens are in a panic, Ray walks over the to the body and looks at his face, “I think he’s dead. His face is all messed up. What was he doing out here?” The teens drag what they think is a lifeless body down the pier, they have just violated the sixth commandment, “Thou shalt now kill.” As the teens are trying to figure out what to do about the body, another teenager Maxx comes along the road driving his truck. Maxx, however, does not see the man Ray hit with Barry’s BMW and Maxx comments on how the car, “Don’t look so new anymore” and tells Ray, “You almost got that rich boy act down.” Ray also broke a commandment in the Bible, he drove Barry’s BMW and this violates the tenth commandment, “Thou shalt not covert—envying something that belongs to another.”
After Maxx drives away, everyone convinces Barry that he will be charged with murder because it is his car that hit the man, even though he was not driving. Ray tells Barry, “There is liquor all over the car, no one will believe I was driving. You will go to jail for manslaughter.” The entire group just violated the ninth amendment to the ten commandments, which states, “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.” No one wants to dump the body in the ocean, and Ray says, “Pretend it is an escaped lunatic with a hook hand, and we are doing everyone a favor. Helen is the only one brave enough to push the body in the ocean, as she does, the man comes back to life, for a moment, and grabs the homecoming crown off of her head. Barry has to jump in the water in retrieve the crown. The man the teens hits violates the eighth commandments by stealing Helen’s crown off of her head, “Thou shalt not steal,” and he pays for this sin later in the movie. After the body is dumped in the ocean, everyone, but Julie agrees not to mention the crime ever again. However, because Julie is tripping and acting skittish, Barry grabs Julie by the arms and makes her promise to take the secret and lies to the grave with her. Ray convinced Barry he was going to be charged with a crime because Ray is poor and did not have family or money to get out of it. Julie was worried that she would lose her scholarship. Helen is also rich, like Barry, but was trying to look out for him.
The friends all lose touch, Julie goes away to college and does poorly. A year later, when she returns home, she finds a letter, when she opens it, the letter says, “I Know What You Did Last Summer.” Then Maxx, the nosy teen, is the first to be killed by the serial killer. Not only did the group violate the ten commandments, but by losing her virginity on the beach, Julie opens up Pandora’s box, which releases evil unto them. It is so secret or lie that Helen loves her hair, after the teens know someone is stalking them and knows what they did, she returns home. While she is pouring herself a soda, someone sneaks into her house, and she unknowingly follows him up the stairs, as her sister, Elsa is talking to her and asking her to come to work to help open the store, Helen refuses and sits on her bad and keeps brushing her long golden locks. Elsa tells Helen, “You and your hair—just so pathetic. So very pathetic.” Helen violates commandment one, “Thou shalt have no other gods before me.” When she wakes up the next day, someone cut her highly coveted hair off, and when she looks in the mirror, the word “Soon,” is written across it. While at the gym, Barry takes a shower, then he gets out of the shower to find his jacket has been stolen out of a locker, and that there is a picture of his car with the words “I Know,” written on it. As he tries to find out who is stalking him, Barry goes outside, and someone gets in his BMW and hits he with it, Barry flies through a wall, blacks out and wakes up in the hospital. The movie goes on to detail how these teens are all tormented and murdered by a fearsome creature. “Children should be here having fun, partying, running people over, and getting away with murder.”
The Great Escape–Reach for the Sky!
Among the most important values that children of God must adhere to are altruism, mindfulness, and a connection with love. However, sometimes in life people will do things just to hurt you. Although altruism, or selflessly helping others, is related to improved mental health, it can also hurt you. I met someone who was having a hard time in life, and wanted to help this person for only 30 days. Then person ended getting attached and putting a guilt trip on me. This person promised that if I kept being supportive, that they would eventually return the favor. So then this situation no longer became altruism, someone ended up taking advantage of my courage and dedication for helping others.
I am sometimes driven by my ambition in an addictive sense. I see progress and refuse to stop. Research on altruism suggest that people who remain mindful and true to their values of helping others are more likely to experience good emotions such as love and joy while helping others, but that is not always true. I personally have been having a little bit of a challenge dealing with a few people for a while, but things got kind of complicated this weekend. Someone I love and care about very much passed away 11 years ago, last Friday, 4 December 2015. It was such a shock to me, I had known him all of my life. My sister and I were at a wedding reception, and we got the call the someone close to us was sick, he went to the hospital, and then three days later he died.
So on Friday, for some reason, I guess because the anniversary of his death came up, I got lonely, and went to a friend’s house. We had a couple of drinks and then someone started talking about the passing of my loved one—we never talk about it anymore. And he just kept going and would not stop, I went numb and was not sure how I was going to react, so I left. And then I got home and I was so sad, I felt a void, and I felt how temporary life is and how when someone leaves the Earth, they do not return. Research on mindfulness (noticing the experiences in the in the present moment rather than fixating on the past or the future) suggest that people who practice mindfulness are more likely to be altruistic and to exhibit better mental health.
However, just a few days ago, I was talking about how I am too old to cry. Yet, I cried so many times this weekend, and then had a few bottles of wine to myself, that I was concerned about my own well-being, this is so out of character for me. Then my neighbor told me another one of my friends passed away just a few days ago. So it really left me feeling floored. Then last night, I went for a walk, as I usually do, and the person I have been interested in, for a while, just walked right past me. And I was like, okay, well, nice to see you. Came home and had a few more drinks. Although it seems like I may be developing a problem, I recognized that before anyone else noticed. People who are mindful and those who follow their values are less likely to develop PTSD and are more likely to recover from addiction, depression, anxiety, and chronic pain.
when you are kind of an anchor in people lives, it would really hurt them to see you suffer and go down a blackhole. My body is a temple of God and I refuse to abuse it, so I have to remove the toxic elements from my life. Then I woke up at 3am, and cried again. And it was because of some things that happened to my sister, and I just do not understand how these things can happen? So then I went online and the person I was interested in was posting on social media how they were out with this other guy and the two of them are posting pictures of each other sharing a chair together and sitting extra close in the car, and I am like okay…it is time for me to let this go.
People who are impulsive are more likely to be driven by immediate gratification, are more likely to struggle with their academic commitment, and may be more likely to struggle with regulating their emotions. I have seen other people, like my sister, be mistreated by guys, and I tell her, “You are too young and too pretty, and can do better,” and I really mean it. So I got to thinking, I do not want to end up in the hospital from alcohol poisoning or potentially over dosing on a substance like others have, so I am going to stop being so understanding. This person I am kind of seeing has been doing nothing, but upsetting me for the past six months and things are not going to change, nor get better. I cannot control life, but I can control myself and move on.
When people know that you are having a hard time, and do nothing but add to it and never do anything sweet, they are toxic. Recently, I wrongly misjudged Jennifer Lawrence and called her a bitch because of how she acted toward someone, and also because she said that guys treat her bad. I was also upset that she selected her career over a relationship, and I could not comprehend it because I want a loving relationship. However, sometimes relationships are abusive and maybe guys are mean to Jennifer Lawrence and picking her career, over a relationship, may have saved her life. One of the principals of being a good Christian is not to judge others because God will make you understand their choices and decision by putting you through the same situations. I had become just like the people I say are foolish for staying in bad relationships. `
Call Me When the Cross Turns Over
Love and friendship know nothing of justice. The value of love is that it overlooks faults, and forgives even crimes. The World imagines those to be at our nature’s depths who are impudent enough to expose its muddy shallows. The dredging of natures is the miry form of art. Analytical psychology is an approach to studying mental health and personality development by investigating consciousness and unconscious processes. Personal development involves a process of individuation, growth as an individual, in which each person can better understand both themselves and aspects of a universal level of the subliminal cognitive state. Many of us are on a noble quest. We spend each moment of every waking hour focused and reflecting on mystery we are trying to solve. Life is about trying to protect the peace the community after an intrusion by outside forces, which we are not akin to. The person who is very determined and on a righteous journey, in the midst of the chaos and deceptions around one is a person who is connected with God, and this allows us to remain strong and peaceful.
Individuation refers to the effort to become a fully human person and to grow into full consciousness. The process of becoming fully human and totally conscious is to understand the good, bad, light and darkness, and it is not an easy choice. The journey to individuation is a lifetime journey. Some people choose to protect their compassion nature with cynicism and apathy because they do not want to feel vulnerable nor uncertain. It is by far more easy for people to pretend like they do not care than to face heartbreak or disappointment. Some people put up barriers because they feel threatened by potential rejection and want to live a painless life. However, by blocking people out who care about you, not only are you hurting them, but you are also hurting yourself. No matter what, life is fluid and while you may think you have a person where you want them, you may lose them while you are not looking. A lot like parking your car in a lot and leaving it unattended. You think it is secure because it has an alarm system, you are constantly watching it, but if someone wants it, they will find a way to get it from you.
When people lose things they care about because they did not cherish them, a feeling of revenge starts to brew, and while they thought they were protecting themselves, they really start to feel the pain of loss, and this can turn into a vengeful rage. Your shadow represents the individual’s discordant desires, instincts, or shortcomings. This is why we are facing so many shootings and violence, people are living fake lives and hurting inside. On Wednesday, 2 December 2015, in San Bernardino, California, USA one to three suspects committed a massacre, killing more than 20 people at the Inland Regional Center, a facility that cares for people with developmental disabilities. This shows you that no targets are off limits, people are killing anyone they want without any regard. Because the conscious ego can only know itself, the contents of the mind and the dark shadows residing inside are unknown to others. Mass shooters are no longer adapting to the outer reality that we all share, but rather to an inner reality. They have a split with reality because there are elements of themselves that are forgotten, repressed, or ignored. To avoid these type of situations, we need to be kind to people and accept others for who they are. We have to learn to surrender, relinquishing part of our own desires and be guided by God to care for others who are having hard times.
We have to learn to train our mind, body, and spirit to be disciplined. In life, everyone faces trials, and just because some are smiling and happy, it does not mean that their life is better than yours, it simply means they are better able to control their emotions. While some people take relationships for granted and are running around trying to get attention and be popular, their loved ones may be in the process of letting going and moving on. A person should contemplative as the spirit converse and assimilates with the unconscious. As one progresses through individuation, actions may change, as the body now acts in congruence with the mind and spirit. When you recognize distressing feelings, the first step is to acknowledge them. If you remain in denial or in a one sided relationship, you will remain discontented and ignorant for the rest of your life. Being alone and uncertain of your future can be a painful and frightening experience, but remember to walk in faith and not by sight. Before examining our own hidden qualities, we may be in complete denial of our shadow elements, yet what we deny in ourselves can often easily be spotted in others. A person may despise another’s quick temper while at the same time fervently suppressing a wish to respond with anger.
The first step in making the acquaintance of a person’s own shadow is admitting that the scary, annoying, or irritating qualities found in others are often the qualities in that individual that evoke the very same responses. For example, if you are dating someone who is in their 40s, who is still going out to nightclubs and trying to be hip, you may despise that aspect of them and you need to eradicate that person from your life. Staying in unhealthy situations disavowals one’s own characteristics and it may be dangerous. The more you suppress yourself, the more darkness and unhappiness grows inside of you, and it will take over your life entirely. The goal in life is to develop a reciprocal relationship. Everyone knows when you are in your 40s, you are too old to be going to nightclubs and trying to look cool. So if you are dating someone, who is older than you, and this is how they behave, break it off and enjoy life so you do not end up like them. Art may disguise complexions, but never improve them. Sometimes people are placed in our lives so we can see what we do not want to become. This shadow holds a message that it may be wise for you to heed. These are messages that may come from your subconscious content, particularly if the vision includes a character that is the same gender as the person with the vision. By paying attention to the message, or the vision, the encounter with the shadow becomes collaborative, rather than hostile in nature.
As unbelievable as it may sound, this shadow is still part of you. You should accept it, attune to it, guide it, and control it. Be mindful, strive to stay mindful and aware of anger and other shadowy feelings, as well as paying attention to your thoughts. Sometimes you go through a lot of the same type of relationships to help you grow. On the path to individuation, a person examines events are meaningful expressions of the collective unconscious. So, let me take that back, if you are dating someone who is immature, as long as they are not harming you or taking anything from you, allow them to be in your life. This could be your spirit testing you to see if you can hang on when things get rough. Let them think they are still the love of your life, and when someone else comes on, they will realize you have left them in the shadows. We have the innate capacity to walk a path through the park that leads us to our true selves. We gather strength from every situation, and allow this to bring you peace, balance, and wholeness, but to benefit from this wisdom, we must first learn to feel the variety of emotions. It is amazing, when you change the way you look at people, and start looking out for them, it is impressive how much better they treat you.
Fire on the Wind–Classic White Man
The World’s greatest need is mutual confidence. No human being knows all the secrets of another’s heart. Yet, we all have some relationships with others, from a passing acquaintance to others we feel a deep kindred bond for, and this makes social life a practical possibility. These relations manifest over time, and friendship, like love, is the child of sympathy, not of complaint. Most people like intense and strong relationships because you form trust, but some relationships are weak. Friendships makes us warmly espouse the interest of others; but it is very cold to the gratification of their passions. Whatever the number of a person’s friends, there will be times in our lives when we have few; but if we have only one enemy, we are lucky indeed if we have not one too many. The beauty and loveliness of friendship is too strong for dim eyes. We all know that we are loved, but some people go through a period of isolation, and it makes them feel unloved, and it is not the type of void that can be filled with the sex, it is a yearning that only warm tender arms can embrace.
The way to strengthen a friendship is through spending time with a person, having emotional intensity, intimacy, and reciprocal services. There are attributes in the in the architecture and conservation of relationships. Perhaps the most delightful friendships are those in which there is much agreement, much disputation, and yet more personal liking. Exalted minds enter more rapidly and closely into the connection of friendship than those of a vulgar stamp. Friendship is a passion. It entrances the being; it tears the soul. All loves of after life can never bring its rapture, or its wretchedness; no bliss so absorbing, no pangs of jealousy or despair so crushing and so keen! The more time you put into relationship, the stronger it will become. This entails the how long you have known each other, how often you see each other, and how much time you spend together. The more time you put into your relation, the stronger it will become. If your relationship is new, it can grow strong if you spend a lot of time together. Time is the foundation of all relationships, and out of love to oneself, one must speak better of a friend than an enemy.
Love is nothing in comparison with the intimacy of two congenial friends. When two people share an intense emotional experience, it strengthens the relationship between them. People often go through intense and dangerous events together, and these experiences foster emotional intensity. If a good face is a letter of recommendation, a good heart is a letter of credit. Intimacy can many forms. While physical and sexual intimacy certainly counts, any instance where a person makes oneself vulnerable to another is an intimate moment. Virtue is so dear to the human heart, that when its form forsakes us, we pursue its shadow. Successful moments of intimacy build trust and build strong bonds. As relationships grow sometimes, they become physical, this usually happens when a guy stops trying to be tough and shows the object of his affection that he is caring and loves them.
There be grains of sense in a simpleton, so long as he be natural. Sometimes people feel stupid when they believe they are giving so much, but not getting much in return, and this is not all directed at one person. In life sometimes we give so much of ourselves and want someone to be there for us, but trust me, even just a walk in the park with a good friend warms the heart. The favors and help that people give one another is called benevolence. Benevolence is the duty of one who aspires to wisdom. When people do things for each other, they tend to feel closer to each other. However, in covert military style situations, people find other ways to demonstrate many dramatic examples of reciprocal services. Sometimes people do work for each other. Someone might promote you if you help them, and emotional intimacy develops. After a while a person might feel like you all are family and expect certain things and feel let down if the services you provide are lacking or missing. They may also feel downtrodden if it is suspected that you are fond of another person or organization. That is because you have an exchange of trust, warmth, intimacy, reciprocal services, emotional intensity, and a long history together. And clearly your bond is still strong through all the ups and downs.
However, sometimes situations go one so long, and they have to do with critics attack the person you care about, while you are trying to maintain a professional relationship, and it becomes frustrating, and one might feel bad or stupid when they reply in the same manner, and it is like how long is this foolishness going to keep going on? A person might even want to leave the environment because of the circumstance of which they cannot seem to control no matter how hard they try. Imagine two people you are very close with whom you spend a lot of time with, have intense emotional experiences, share intimacy, and for whom you do favors. It is very unlikely that those two people do not have at least a passing acquaintance. They do not need to have a strong relationship, but we would expect them to have some connection to one another. It is so unlikely that this situation occurs that it is termed forbidden. These situations will eventually resolve themselves when a tie forms between the two previous strangers. The only certain as well as laudable way of setting ourselves above another person: by becoming their benefactor. People develop stronger relationships by spending time together, sharing intense emotional experiences, and intimacies, and doing things for one another. Some relationships that develop are destined to be. You are the most excellent of people and your lips have been anointed with grace, since God has blessed you for every.
For Richer or Poorer–the North was Blue
Love may be liked to a disease in this, that when it is denied a vent in one part, it will certainly break out in another. Yesterday, I was kind of sad because I was lonely. And so I hung out with a few of my neighbors, had a few drinks, and went to a concert, and stood in the front role and smiled and danced and clapped the entire time. I asked my friend to come back to my apartment with me, but she declined because she knew I was drunk. So I got back to my place, took my clothes off and went to bed. Yet, when I woke up this morning, I was sad.
I did not kiss anyone, nor hook up with anyone, nor did I do anything wrong, but I still felt a little blue, like I felt guilty for having a good time. My feelings of guilt have nothing to do with other people in the World suffering. However, there are remarkable differences among people with respect to attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors associated with happiness, and these differences are in part related to our personality and how we were raised. I feel like my parents would be disappointed in me, but in reality, I know they would be happy I went out and had fun because they think I do not enjoy life much.
I am not depressed or anything like that, but I do somewhat have a stressful life and it is rare that I get to have fun without anything going wrong, and last night, everything was perfect, everything went right. I guess the reason I feel bad is because I am in a relationship, and I had fun without the person I am dating, and I wanted my fun moments to be shared with that individual. However, the person I am seeing goes out and has fun all the time without me. And maybe it is the disappointment of my spouse that I am picking up on?
Some might say, why are you even in a relationship with someone who never spends time with you? Well, when you love a person and you two make promises, you tend to want to keep them. And at least I am not being used nor in a dangerous or abusive relationship. Technically, I did absolutely nothing wrong, and the night was perfect, but you were missing and I feel bad. Nonetheless, there is plenty of time to create happy memories together, and there is nothing wrong with me enjoying myself and the company of others sometimes.
Maybe I feel guilty because I know what I wanted to do, but did not? Overall, all I wanted was to hang out with someone, but when some start drinking indecent thoughts tend to slip in our minds. Love frequently dies of time alone—much more frequently of displacement. There is only one perfect flower in the wilderness of Life, Love. The circle of love is complete. It comprehends all, includes all, and binds all together with cords of everlasting unity. I cannot depart from its presence nor wander from its care. My love is complete within me. The love of God binds me to itself, and will not let me go.
Randolph Harris II International Institute 