While I do live, I resolve to live with all my might. I resolve never to lose one moment of time and to improve my use of time in the most profitable way I possibly can. If it were the last hour of my life, I resolve never to do anything I would not do. Leadership and planning go together. Leaders plan! They do not wait for a time to plan. They do not complain about not having time for planning. They do not make excuses for not planning. They simply and systematically set aside time to dream about the future, envision possibilities, project and extrapolate, predict, set goals, outline strategies, and establish timelines. That is called planning. It is what all good leaders do. In the literature about wisdom many special rules for our daily life are given. The Bible is full of them. However, they are all connected with each other in that they are ruled by the encounter with the holy. In all of them wisdom appears as the acceptance of one’s finitude. In the light of this insight, let us look at expression of wisdom in our daily life. Wisdom is present in parents who know the limits of their authority and so do not become idols first and crushed idols later. Wisdom is present in children who recognize the limits of their independence and do not despise the heritage they have received and on which they live, even in rebelling against their parents. #RandolphHarris 1 of 21

Nephi sees in vision the land of promise; the righteousness, iniquity, and downfall of its inhabitants; the coming of the Lamb of God among them; how the Twelve Disciples and the Twelve Apostles will judge Israel; and the loathsome and filthy state of those who dwindle in unbelief. About 600-592 Before Christ. “And it came to pass that the Angel said unto me: Look, and behold thy seed, and also the seed of thy brethren. And I looked and beheld the land of promise; and I beheld multitudes of people, yea, even as it were in number as many as the sand of the sea. And it came to pass that I beheld multitudes gathered together to battle, one against the other; and I beheld wars, and rumors of wars, and great slaughters with the sword among my people. And it came to pass that I beheld many generations pass away, after the manner of wars and contentions in the land; and I beheld many cities, yea, even that I did not number them. And it came to pass that I saw a mist of darkness on the face of the land of promise; and I saw lightnings, and I heard thunderings, and Earthquakes, and all manner of tumultuous noises; and I saw the Earth and the rocks, that they rent; and I saw mountains tumbling into pieces, and I saw the plains of the Earth, that they were broken up; and I saw many cities that they were sunk; and I saw many that they were burned with fire; and I saw many that did tumble to the Earth, because of the quaking thereof. #RandolphHarris 2 of 21

“And it came to pass after I saw these things, I saw the vapor of darkness, that it passed from off the face of the Earth; and behold, I saw multitudes who had not fallen because of the great and terrible judgements of the Lord. And I saw the Heavens open, and the Lamb of God descending out of Heaven; and he came down and showed himself unto them. And I also saw and bear record that they Holy Ghost fell upon twelve others; and they were ordained of God, and chose. And the Angel spake unto me saying: Behold the twelve disciples of the Lamb, who are chosen to minister unto thy seed. And he said unto me: Thou rememberest the twelve apostles of the Lamb? Behold they are they who shall judge the twelve tribes of Israel; wherefore, the twelve ministers of thy seed shall be judged of them; for ye are of the house of Israel. And these twelve ministers whom beholdest shall judge thy seed. And, behold, they are righteous forever; for because of their faith in the Lamb of God their garments are made white in his blood,” reports 1 Nephi 12.1-10. Of those who see the essence of God, one sees Him more perfectly than another. This, indeed, does not take place as if one had a more perfect similitude of God than another, since that vision will not spring from any similitude; but it will take place because one intellect will have a greater power or faculty to see God than another. #RandolphHarris 3 of 21

The faculty of seeing God, however, does not belong to the created intellect naturally, but is given to it by the light of glory, which establishes the intellect in a kind of “deiformity.” Hence the intellect which has more of the light of glory will see God the more perfectly; and one will have a fuller participation of the light of glory who has more charity; because where there is the greater charity, there is the more desire; and desire in a certain degree makes the one desiring apt and prepared to receive the object desired. Hence one who possesses the more charity, will see God the more perfectly, and will be the more beatified. “And the Angel said unto me: Look! And I looked, and beheld three generations pass away in righteousness; and their garments were white even like unto the Lamb of God. And the Angel said unto me: These are made white in the blood of the Lamb, because of their faith in him. And I, Nephi, also saw many the fourth generation who passed away in righteousness. And it came to pass that I saw the multitude of the Earth gathered together. And the Angel said unto me: Behold thy seed, and also the seed of thy brethren. And it came to pass that I looked and beheld the people of my seed gathered together in multitudes against the seed of my brethren; and they were gathered together in battle” reports 1 Nephi 12.11-15. #RandolphHarris 4 of 21

The diversity of seeing will not arise on the part of the object seen, for the same object will be presented to all—the essence of God; nor will it arise from the diverse participation of the object seen by different similitudes; but it will arise on the part of the diverse faculty of the intellect, not, indeed, the natural faculty, but the glorified faculty. “And the Angel spake unto me, saying: Behold the fountain of filthy water which thy father saw; yea, even the river of which he spake; and the depths thereof are the depths of hell. And the mists of darkness are the temptations of the devil, which blindeth the eyes, and hardeneth the hearts of the children of men, and leadeth them away into broad roads, that they perish and are lost. And the large and spacious building, which thy father saw, is vain imaginations and the pride of the children of men. And a great and a terrible gulf divideth them; yea, even the word of the justice of the Eternal God, and the Messiah who is the Lamb of God, of whom the Holy Ghost beareth record, from the beginning of the World until this time, and from this time henceforth and forever. And while the Angel spake these words, I beheld and saw that the seed of my brethren did contend against my seed, according to the word of the Angel; and because of the pride of my seed, and the temptations of the devil, I beheld that the seed of my brethren did overpower the people of my seed,” reports 1 Nephi 12.16-19. #RandolphHarris 5 of 21

It is impossible for any created intellect to comprehend God; yet for the mind to attain to God in some degree is great beatitude. However, no created intellect can attain to that perfect mode of the knowledge of the Divine intellect whereof it is intrinsically capable. Which thus appears—Everything is knowable according to its actuality. However, God, whose being is infinite, is infinitely knowable. Now no created intellect can know God infinitely. For the created intellect knows the Divine essence more or less perfectly in proportions as it receives a greater or lesser light of glory. Since therefore the created light of glory received into any created intellect cannot be infinite, it is clearly impossible for any created intellect to know God in an infinite degree. Hence it is impossible that it should comprehend God. “And it came to pass that I beheld, and saw the people of the seed of my brethren that they had overcome my seed; and they went forth in multitudes upon the face of the land. And I saw them gathered together in multitudes; and I saw wars and rumors of wars among them; and in wars and rumors of wars I saw many generations pass away. And the Angel said unto me: Behold these shall dwindle in unbelief. And it came to pass that I beheld, after they had dwindled in unbelief they became a dark, and loathsome, and filthy people, full of idleness and all manner of abominations,” reports 1 Nephi 12.20-23. #RandolphHarris 6 of 21

Wisdom is present in teachers who are aware of their limits in dealing bot with truth and with their pupils, and who ask themselves again and again whether wisdom shines through the knowledge they communicate. Wisdom is present in students who question the principles behind whatever they are studying and its meaning for their lives; wise are they who realize both the necessity and the limits of all learning and the superiority of love over knowledge. Wise are those people who are aware of their emotional and intellectual limitations as people in their encounter with women. Wise are those women wo acknowledge their finitude by accepting the man as the other pole of a common humanity. And if they accept each other without anxiety, without hostility, without abuse, without dishonesty, but in the power of love which is rooted in the awareness of the eternal, then both show wisdom. The greatest wisdom is needed where it is most painful to accept our finitude—in our failures, errors, and the guilt acquired by our foolishness. It is hard for us to accept failure, perhaps total failure, in our work. It is difficult to acknowledge error, perhaps in our judgment of those we love in friendship or marriage. It is humanly impossible to confess guilt to oneself or to others without looking at that which is greater than our heart, the eternal. #RandolphHarris 7 of 21

One who possesses this wisdom, this painfully acquired wisdom, knows that nothing can separate one from the eternal wisdom which is God, neither failure nor guilt. Our final wisdom is to accept our foolishness and to look at the place in history in which wisdom itself appeared in the garb of utter foolishness, the Cross of the Christ. Here the wisdom that is eternally with God, that is present in the Universe, and that loves the children of humans, appears in fullness. And in those who look at it and receive it, faith and wisdom become one. Sometimes a new conflict is created between compulsive, contradictory strivings on the one hand and a kind of internal dictatorship imposed by the inner disturbance. And one reacts to this inner dictatorship just as a person might react to a comparable political dictatorship: one may identify oneself with it, that is, feel that one is as wonderful and ideal as the dictator tells one one is; or one many stand on tiptoe to try to measure up to its demands; or one may rebel against the coercion and refuse to recognize the imposed obligation. If one reacts in the first way, we get the impression of a narcissistic individual, inaccessible to criticism; the existing rift, then, is not consciously felt as such. In the second instance we have the perfectionistic person, Dr. Freud superego type. #RandolphHarris 8 of 21

In the third, the person appears not to be accountable to anyone or anything: one tends to become erratic, irresponsible, and negativistic. I speak advisedly of impressions and appearances, because whatever is one’s reaction, one continues to be fundamentally restive. Even a rebellious type who ordinarily believes one is “free” labours under the enforced standards one is trying to overthrow; though the fact that one is still in the clutches of one’s idealized image may show only in one’s clutches of one’s idealized image may show only in one’s swinging those standards as a whip over others. Sometimes a person goes through stages of alternating between one extreme and another. One may, for instance, try for a time to be superhumanly good and, getting no comfort from that, swing to the opposite pole of rebellion violently against such standards. Or one may switch from an apparently unreserved self-adoration to perfectionism. More often we find a combination of these variant attitudes. All of which points to the fact—understandable in the light of our theory—that none of the attempts are satisfactory; that they all are doomed to failure; that we must regard them as desperate efforts to get out of an intolerable situation; that as in any other intolerable situation the most dissimilar means are tried—if one fails, another is resorted to. #RandolphHarris 9 of 21

All these consequences combine to build a mighty barrier against true development. The person cannot learn from one’s mistakes because one does not see them. In spite of one’s assertions to the contrary one is actually bound to lose interest in one’s own growth. What one has in mind when one speaks of growth is an unconscious idea of creating a more perfect idealized image, one that will be without drawbacks. The task of therapy, therefore, is to make the patient aware of one’s idealized image in all its detail, to assist one in gradually understanding all its functions and subjective values, and to show one the suffering that it inevitably entails. One will then start to wonder whether the price is not too high. However, one can relinquish the image only when the needs that have created it are considerably diminished. I have considered so far a currently sustained life that is threatened by what some others know about the individual’s past or about the shady parts of one’s present. Now another perspective on double living must be considered. When an individual leaves a personal identification behind, often with a well-rounded biography attached, including assumptions as to how one is likely to end up. In one’s current community the individual will develop a biography in others’ minds too, potentially a fully portrait including a version of the kind of person one used to be and the background out of which one came. #RandolphHarris 10 of 21

Obviously, a discrepancy may arise between these two sets of knowings about one; something like a double biography can develop, with those knew one when and those who know one now each thinking that they know the whole being. Often this biographical discontinuity is bridged by one’s affording accurate and adequate information about one’s past to those in one’s present, and by those in one’s past bringing their biographies of one up to date through news and gossip about one. This bridging is eased when one has become is no a discredit too much what one has become, which of course is the usual state of affairs. In brief, there will be discontinuities in one’s biography but not discrediting ones. Now while students are sufficiently alive to the effect on the individual’s present of having had a blameworthy past, insufficient attention has been given to the effect upon one’s earlier biographers of a blameworthy present. There has been insufficient appreciation of the importance to an individual of preserving a good memory of oneself among those with whom one no longer lives, even though this fact fits nicely into what is called reference group theory. #RandolphHarris 11 of 21

The classic case here is that of the man or woman of the evening who, although adjusted to one’s urban round and the contacts one routinely has in it, fears to “bump into” a person from one’s home town who will of course be able to discern one’s present social attributes and bring the news back home. In this case one’s closet is as big as one’s beat, and one is the skeleton that resides in it. This sentimental concern with those with whom we no longer have actual dealings provides one of the penalties of taking on an immoral occupation, it is bums, not bankers, who decline to have their pictures in the paper, a modesty due to fear of being recognized by someone from home. There is some suggestion of a natural cycle of passing. The cycle may start with unwitting passing that the passer never learns ne is engaging in; move from there to unintended passing that the surprised passer learns about; from there to passing for fun; passing during non-routine parts of the social round, such as vacations and travel; passing during routine daily occasions, such as at work or in service establishments; finally, disappearance—complete passing over in all areas of life, the secret being known only to the passer oneself. #RandolphHarris 12 of 21

It may be noted that when the relatively complete passing is essayed, the individual sometimes consciously arranges one’s own rite de passage, going to another city, holding up in a room for a few days with preselected clothing and cosmetic one has brought one, and then, like a butterfly, emerging to try the brand new wings. At any phase, of course, there can be a break in the cycle and a return to the fold. If it is not possible at this time to speak of such a cycle with any assurance, and if it is necessary to suggest that some discreditable attributes preclude the final phases of the cycle, it is at least possible to look for various points of stability in passing penetration; certainly it is possible to see that the extent of passing can vary, from momentary and unintended at one extreme to the classic kind of deliberate total passing. Earlier, two phases in the learning process of the stigmatized person were suggested: one’s learning the normal point of view and learning that one is disqualified according to it. Presumably a next phase consists of one’s learning to cope with the way others treat the kind of person one can be shown to be. A still later phase is now my concern, namely, learning to pass. Where a differentness is relatively unapparent, the individual must learn that in fact one can true oneself to secrecy. #RandolphHarris 13 of 21

The point of view of observers of oneself must be entered carefully, but not anxiously carried further than the observers themselves do. Starting with a feeling that everything known to oneself is known to others, one often develops a realistic appreciation that this is not so. For example, it is reported that marihuana smokers slowly learn that when “high” they can function in the immediate presence of those who know them well, without these others discovering anything—a learning that apparently helps to transform an occasional user into a regular one. Similarly, there are records of people who, having just lost their virginity, examine themselves in the mirror to see if their stigma shows, only slowly coming to believe that in fact they look no different from the way they used to. A parallel can be cited regarding the experience of a male after his first overt same sexed experience: “Did it [his first same sex experience] bother you later?” I asked. “Oh no, I only worried about somebody finding out. I was afraid my mother and dad could tell by looking at me. However, they acted like always, and I began to feel confident and secure once more.” It may be suggested that, due to social identity, the individual with a secret differentness will find oneself during the daily and weekly round in three possible kinds of places. #RandolphHarris 14 of 21

There will be forbidden or out-of-bounds places, where person of the kind one can be shown to be are forbidden to be, and where exposure means expulsion—an eventuality often so unpleasant to all parties that a tacit cooperation will sometimes forestall it, the interloper providing a thin disguise and the rightfully present accepting it, even though both know the other knows of the interloping. There are civil places, where persons of the individual’s kind when know to be of one’s kind, are carefully, and sometimes painfully, treated as if they were not disqualified for routine acceptance, when in fact they somewhat are. Finally, there are back places, where person of the individual’s kind stand exposed and find they need not try to conceal their stigma nor be overly concerned with cooperatively trying to disattend it. In some cases this license arises from having chosen the company of those with the same or a similar stigma. For example, it is said that carnivals provide physically disabled employees with a World in which their stigma is relatively little an issue. In other cases, the back place may be involuntarily created as a result of individuals being herded together administratively against their will on the basis of a common stigma. It might be added that whether the individual enters a back place voluntarily or involuntarily, the place is likely to provide an atmosphere of special piquancy. #RandolphHarris 15 of 21

Here the individual will be able to be at ease among one’s fellows and also discover that acquaintances one thought were not of one’s own kind really are. However, as the following citation suggest, one will also run the risk of being easily discredited should a normal person known from elsewhere enter the place. A 17-year-old Mexican-American boy was committed to the hospital [for those with severe intellectual disabilities] by the courts as a mental defective. He strongly rejected this definition, claiming that there was nothing wrong with him and that he wanted to go to a more “respectable” detention center for juvenile delinquents. Sunday morning, a few days after he arrived at the hospital, he was being taken to church with several other patients. By an unfortunate circumstance, his girl friend was visiting the hospital that morning with a friend whose infant brother was a patient at the hospital, and was walking toward him. When he saw her she had not seen him and e did not intend for her to do so. He turned from her and fled as fast as he could run, until overtaken by employees who thought he had gone berserk. When questioned about this behaviour he explained that his girl friend did not know he was “in this place for dummies” and he could not bear the humiliation of being seen in the hospital as a patient. #RandolphHarris 16 of 21

The beat of a lady of the evening constitutes for her the same kind of threat: It was this aspect of this social situation that I experienced when I visited the carriage roads in Hyde Park [a female social researcher states]. The deserted appearance of the footpaths and the apparent purposefulness of any woman who did walk along them were not only sufficient to announce my purpose to the public, they also forced upon me the realization that this area was reserved for men and women of the evening—it was a place set aside for them and would lend its colouring to anyone who chose to enter it. This partitioning of the individual’s World into forbidden, evil, and back places establishes the going price for revealing or concealing and the significance of being known about or not known about, whatever one’s choice of information strategies. Just as the individual’s World is divided up spatially by one’s social identity, so also is it divided up by one’s personal identity. There are places where, as is said, one is known personally: either some of those present are likely to know one personally or the individual in charge of the area (hostess, maître de, bartender, and the like) knows one personally, in either case assuring that one’s having been present there will be demonstrable later. #RandolphHarris 17 of 21

Secondly, there are places where one can expect with some confidence not to “bump into” anyone who knows one personally, and where (barring the special contingencies faced by the famed and ill-famed, whom many persons know of without knowing personally) one can expect to remain anonymous, eventful to no one. Whether or not it is embarrassing to one’s personal identity to be in a place where, incidentally, one is known personally will vary of course with the circumstances, especially with the question of whom one is “with.” Given that the individual’s spatial World will be divided into different regions according to the contingencies embedded in them for the management of social and personal identity, one can go on to consider some of the problems and consequences of passing. This consideration will partly overlap with folk wisdom; cautionary tales concerning the contingencies of passing form part of the morality we employ to keep people in their places. One who passes find unanticipated needs to disclose discrediting information about oneself, as when a wife of a mental patient tries to collect her husband’s unemployment insurance or a “married” homosexual tries to insure his or her house and finds one must try to explain one’s peculiar chose of beneficiary. #RandolphHarris 18 of 21

One also suffers from “in-deeper-ism,” that is, pressure to elaborate a life further and further to prevent a given disclosure. One’s adaptive techniques can themselves give rise to hurt feelings and misunderstandings on the part of others. One’s effort to conceal incapacities may cause one to display other ones or give the appearance of doing so: slovenliness, as when a near-blind person, affecting to see, trips over a stool, or spills a drink down one’s shirt; inattentiveness, stubbornness, woodenness, or distance, as when a hard of hearing person fails to respond to a remark proffered one by someone unaware of one’s disability; sleepiness, as when a teacher perceives a student’s petit mal epilepsy seizure as momentary daydreaming; drunkenness, as when a person with cerebral palsy finds that one’s gait is always being misinterpreted. Further, one who passes leaves oneself open to learning what others “really” think of persons of one’s kind, both when they do not know they are dealing with someone of one’s kind and when they start out not knowing but learn part way through the encounter and sharply veer to another course. One finds oneself not knowing how far information about oneself has gone, this being a problem whenever one’s boos or schoolteacher is dutifully informed of one’s stigma, but others are not. #RandolphHarris 19 of 21

As suggested, one can become subject to extortion of various kinds by person who know of one’s secret and do not have good reason for keeping quiet about. May Thy Word, O Lord, Which endureth for ever in Heaven, abide continually in the Temple of Thy Church; that the presence of the Inhabitant may be an unfailing glory to the habitation; through Thy mercy when Thou art present blessings are mine. O Lord God, Thou art my protecting arm, fortress, refuge, shield, buckler. Fight for me and my foes must flee; uphold me and I cannot fall; strengthen me and I stand unmoved, unmoveable; equip me and I shall receive no wound; stand by me and Satan will depart; anoint my lips with a song of salvation and I shall shout Thy victory; give me abhorrence of all evil, as a vile monster that defiles Thy law, casts off Thy yoke, defiles my nature, spreads misery. Teach me to look to Jesus on His cross and so to know sin’s loathsomeness in Thy sight. There is no pardon but through Thy Son’s death, no cleaning but in His precious blood, no atonement but His to expiate evil. Show me the shame, the agony, the bruises of incarnate God, that I may read boundless guilt in the boundless price; may I discern the deadly viper in its real malignity, tear it with holy indignation from my heart, resolutely turn from its every snare, refuse to hold polluting dalliance with it. #RandolphHarris 20 of 21

Blessed Lord Jesus, at Thy cross may I be taught the awful miseries from which I am saved, ponder what the word “lost” implies, see the fires of eternal destruction; then may I cling more closely to Thy broken self, adhere to Thee with firmer faith, be devoted to Thee with total being, detest sin as strongly as Thy love to me is strong, and may holiness be the atmosphere in which I live. Human morality arises out of culture and family training and is based on what is proper and expected to the extent that Godly people have influenced that society. Submission to God’s law arises out of love for God and a grateful response to His grace and is based on a delight in His law as revealed in Scripture. When the societal standard of morality varies from the law of God written in Scripture, we then see the true nature of human morality. We discover that it is just as hostile to the law of God as is the attitude of the most hardened sinner. Sanctification begun in our hearts by the Holy Spirit changes our attitude. Instead of being hostile to God’s law, we begin to delight in it. We find that God’s commands are not burdensome, but rather are holy, righteous and good. This radical and dramatic change in our attitude toward God’s commands is a gift of His grace, brought about solely by the mighty working of His Holy Spirit within us. We play no more part in this initial act of sanctification than we do in our justification. As Paul said, “All this is from God.” #RandolphHarris 21 of 21

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