We do not know how long people have been taking vacations, but we are all for it. The word vacation comes from the Latin vacare, which means to be empty, free from duty, and is also the root of the English word vacant. Vacant has come to have a rather negative meaning in our society—nothing there. This association may indicate that even regarding words, our value system has taught us to think that full is preferable to empty. And that is a pity. Why? Because emptiness can be a very good idea. Sometimes we must empty ourselves of everything in order to make room for something good and full to come in. Those who practice meditation know that one of its goals is to get rid of all extraneous thoughts and feelings, to make room for something new and rich. In our present discussion, we extend this idea to mean that when we vacation, we should empty ourselves of the worries and concerns of the workaday World. If I go on vacation, whether a simple weekend, or a year-long leave, I must want to forget the fatiguing responsibilities and cares of my work.   

According to legend, God created the World in just six days, and rested on the seventh—now called the Sabbath. Our English word sabbatical comes from that same root; it is used to refer to educational institutions’’ practice of providing for teachers’ well-being and development by giving them a sabbatical, a year-long leave, once every seven years. A few businesses are beginning to give their employees similar extended periods of time off every few years, with partial or full pay, to provide times of full rest, recuperation, and recharging. We think these companies are wise.   When people take vacations, even if the employees do nothing directly related to their work during this time, they will grow. They will come back to work refreshed and renewed, and they will probably do better, more productive work, plus having a better feeling about working for a company that is concerned with its employees’ mental health. How do you spend your vacations? Many people consider their time off well spent if they can simply relax, read a book, and maybe have the feeling that they are getting away with something simply by doing nothing.   

The present moment is freedom. Being in the present moment is sufficient. Such presentness involves a lightness and fluidity in which preoccupations and compulsive adjustments do not pertain. Ryan experienced intense anxiety, which at first could not be clearly associated with life events. When he accepted and released identification with past memories and feelings of hurt and pain, he became strong enough not to be vulnerable. There is often a lack of understanding of the function of wanting and desire.  The way something comes into our life is because we have chosen it. It was the result of our intention, or we made a decision for it. It has come into our life in spite of desire. Intimate relationship promises so, so much, but only delivers what we put into it. This does not mean that it is all work—far from it! Much of what we need to put into it is what we need to extend to the World anyway: our love, our compassion, our integrity, our courage, our yearning for a deeper life. And what a lucid joy it is to enter so fully in consciously shared living—shared heart, shared being, shared evolution—that is everything that arises, no matter how painful, is permitted to further our intimacy.  

And what a gift it is to be so close, so deeply attached and bonded, that we cannot get away, for very long, from facing things that we ordinarily would not face at all. Intimate relationship, fully entered into, keeps us on track. Transformation through intimacy. This is described as a moment of presentness of awareness, and as moments in which the usual self-references did not occur. The feeling in the room at such times is one of involvement, as the energy of attending is undistracted and present. There is a perceived quietness, as the automatic thinking and feeling about how to control undesired events, the history of problematic feelings of lack or hurt, and the attempt to rehearse for or anticipate and control future events simply is not occurring.   

The contact between us is succinct, open, and able to verbalize the present awareness that is occurring. The tone of our contact s silent and still, and outwardly calm and receptive. The content of the words being exchanged seemed less important, although the words provided a way to indicate the change was occurring through nonresistance of the present. The structure of self that depended upon the familiar, upon a context for controlling experience and maintaining an image, have been released. One may view such a release as a kind of passing of the familiar. The seeds that have been planted are blossoming in unexpected ways. Such blossoming occurs when there is readiness to release the image of security embedded in self-dialogue, and the preservation of the image associated with being seen favorably by others, and through reflection, by self. When such attempts to maintain security are relinquished and present being is embraced as is, strength becomes evident as the absence of any attempt to maintain self. The moment I saw you walk through those double doors; I felt a strong connection from my heart to yours. When my eyes came upon you, it was as if time stopped. Everything but you and I stood still, and our relationship had become anew.