One of the best ways to turn on to living is to develop meaningful friendships. Friendships are sought by each of us because we are gregarious, or social beings. We have a requirement to be accepted by, to associate with, and to pursue life with other individuals. We have a desire to share our identities and humanness with other humans. The types of friendships that an individual develops depends mostly on the number and variety of interest he has. Thus, an individual having a wide range of interests will, while pursuing each of these interests, meet other individuals who share at least that particular hobby, goal, dream, or objective. In this manner, then, people meet and, if their personalities are harmonious, they become friends and pursue their goals together. 

While this health mosaic has pieces still missing, the outlines of the picture are clear enough and the data consistent enough for even the most skeptical to sense that the correlation between deficient human relationships and premature death is worth exploring further. No nation spends more money on biomedical research than the United States of America, “Total war” has been declared on heart disease and on cancer, and billions of dollars have been spent by taxpayers and the United States government to eradicate these ailments. Loneliness seems to be a serious problem in our society, and for many the task of easing this affliction seems to be an overwhelming burden. Yet, while the relationship between maladies and loneliness seems both empirically and intuitively obvious, our government has never declared “war” on loneliness.   

Our nation may very well have reached a point where it is working feverishly to control aliments that we ourselves are causing. What is it that allows us to wage “war” against heart disease while at the same time ignoring the correlation between divorce and premature coronary death? Why do we so readily tolerate social situations that seem to lead to inexorably to our own physical destruction? Why do we build elaborate and expensive hospital coronary care units to save peoples’ lives, only to discharge some of them back into homes of such acute social isolation that their lives will be quickly terminated? A similar suggestion was made about child(ren) who suffer from parental loss or abandonment. The individual clinical cases we described also indicate that unpleasant human interactions or the recall of traumatic events could also precipitate life threatening cardiac changes in individuals already predisposed to show such changes. 

Apart from these medical dilemmas, there is an even larger social paradox. Very few people want to be lonely. Most try to find love. Very few individuals marry with the intention of getting divorced or rejoice over the loss of their child(ren) through divorce. No one really wishes to live in constant interpersonal chaos or to be the cause of frequent disruptions of human relationships. Loneliness, the lack of love, divorce, and the loss of one’s child(ren) or loved ones—these are not situations enthusiastically embraced by the vast majority of people. Few physicians would deny the reality of a broken heart. However, at the same time, most feel they can do precious little to influence psychosocial factors that case the disease or to alleviate the physical impact of divorce or bereavement. Loneliness seems to complicated and overwhelming when compared with other, more precise aspects of modern scientific medicine—a specific antibiotic for a specific infection—that many clinicians see the whole problem as unmanageable. 

Friendships and loving relationships, then, are important, rewarding experiences for each of us. They satisfy our requirement to express our identities and humanness. They also help us to turn on to life and live fuller, richer, and more joyful lives. You cannot learn about fun by reading about it. Or can you? In your quest for self-acceptance and enjoyment of life, you may get help from books, articles, and pamphlets that come from people who are fully alive. Like association with such people, in the flesh, the attitudes in such writings may rub off on you after a while. Certainly, they can be lifesavers during those times (which happen to all of us) when you and everyone you know may be bored or turned off about life. The bravest thing a human being can do is dare to love another individual. May my floating thoughts turn to colorful stars and knock at your beautiful dreams every night.