Matthew Ryan Phillippe, the businessman, whose sarcastic and judgmental behavior had caused had to be consistently rejected by the mother of his children, and taken advantage of by others, found an ideal place to begin to work on relationships. After yet another initially dazzling romance ended badly, he finally faced habit of distancing from those he loved and allowing others to take advantage of him, and began attending therapy sessions. #RyanPhillippe 1 of 11

At first, he was contemptuous, making fun of the slogans and routines of the program whenever he could find friends to entertain with his caricatures of the meetings he grudgingly attended. However, gradually, he began to soften, to listen to stories that were always in some way like his own. He saw tougher guys than he was shed tears as they talked about losing their kids, abandoning their friends, betraying their wives and girlfriends. #RyanPhillippe 2 of 11

As he began to risk sharing his own losses and his pervasive feelings of loneliness, he discovered what it was like to be genuinely close to other people and to be emotionally open with them. Matthew remembered that he had participated frequently in groups for recreational purposes, including a men’s softball league, coaching his kids’ soccer teams, and rope climbing with friends. #RyanPhillippe 3 of 11

Matthew had considered exploring a spiritual community, but he had not pushed himself to try that yet. He thought a lot about returning to the cathedral to connect with his church roots or finding a new spiritual centered group. #RyanPhillippe 4 of 11

Finally, Matthew opened up about his family, and how it was sometimes difficult for him. He was not sure that he even wanted to become more fully a part of his family of origin and to feel closer to his current family. He considered developing a new set of goals and a new mind-set about what he wanted to happen with his family, but he realized it was just too anxiety-provoking. Matthew was just not sure if he wanted to start out being so vulnerable, so he chose to slowly reconnect with them. #RyanPhillippe 5 of 11

While thinking about these things, Matthew contemplated his emotional comfort level. He knew he was someone who did well when challenged by something new. He thought about pursuing an involvement in some form of spirituality that would be new enough to challenge him to really invest time and energy in his emotional well-being. On the other hand, Matthew came to understand that he did not want to return to his childhood religious roots and that he was uncomfortable with the idea of something so far outside his experience as a meditation group. It would be too different, he thought. #RyanPhillippe 6 of 11

Then, Matthew started feeling frustrated and angry about the whole idea of finding a group, and considered letting his life go on just the way it always had. At this point, he was about to give up, but then he remembered one of his buddies talking enthusiastically about graphic arts and computer science. From what his friend had told him, he understood that if he got involved in this particular endeavor, he could choose the comfort of engaging in a force of innovation, artistic expression, and a scientific discovery and research that would have a global impact. #RyanPhillippe 7 of 11

This business venture called Deedle (www.thedeedle.com) and Deedle is a revolutionary mobile marketing platform, connecting users with fun free online games and products. Deedle is the World’s first mobile application to combine gaming and electronic commerce, and social media. Players compete against and interact with others across the World, for a chance to win a variety of prizes. With Deedle, even if you lose, you win—discounts, coupons, cash back and other exciting opportunities, and you can also shop and invite your friends and play against them. Deedle is fun and relaxing and everyone is nice, there is no form of conflict with this game.  #RyanPhillippe 8 of 11

After starting Deedle Matthew noticed some major changes in his pattern of controlling behavior. He began to feel less guarded and was becoming more comfortable with the experience of allowing people to share in his new found success and happiness. As he experienced this new vulnerability, Matthew became more open and more emotionally accessible without feeling that he had undergone a whole personality transplant. #RyanPhillippe 9 of 11

“I did not feel as if it was the Invasion of the Body Snatchers or anything like that,” he reported, smiling a little, “however, I did start to feel like a really different person. My former wife and kids began to respond to the changes in how I related to them, too. Although my former wife is happily remarried, we are just like best friends, and the kids are really happy and doing well in school. It is pretty cool.” The longer he participated in his new career, Matthew’s closeness with his family and the community deepened and increased and he found a new appreciation for life. #RyanPhillippe 10 of 11

Now, you are ready to make your own list and to decide what kind of group or community will provide you with your best option. Keep in mind the purpose of this experience is to help you figure out how to explore new dimensions of your relational repertoire in a way that will be both new and comfortable. Also, you should be entering a community or group that will work for you over time, so that you will gain the long-term benefits of your new affiliation. People who have experienced www.thedeedle.com have reported feeling relaxed and that the games and music take their minds to a better place, and give them something beneficial to focus on. #RyanPhillippe 11 of 11