Tell me what a person dreams, and I will tell you what they love. Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness. Do not ask us how we make our dream tall with facts. The glory of a dream is the—that it despises facts, and makes its own. Our dream saves us from going mad; that is enough. Wish you a bright future and not forget me. If life is a flower, love is the honey of the flower. May your future be as beautiful as a rose, and as sweet as candy. The power of beauty, when accompanied by compassion, is irresistible. May bright sunshine, youth strength, beautiful appearance and a comfortable smile belong to you forever!

Just as in childhood, there are pivotal experiences in our adult lives that determine the pattern of our responses in subsequent relationships. Adult experiences may have somewhat less power over us because we have already developed our basic biological, emotion, and mental characteristics. Nonetheless, we are always changing and growing and we are deeply affected by our adult experiences in beneficial and negative ways. Strange that some things so beautiful should be terrible and deadly. We live and learn. After violent emotions, most people, and all boys demand food.

It is undeniable that if we experience trauma or tragic losses, that will have great importance in determining many things about who we are from that time on. For instance, all those who have every lost their homes because of a natural disaster, or social upheaval, or personal misfortune know that their feelings of personal safety and security will never be the same for some time. Other tragic events such as the loss of a child, a sibling, a close friend, or a life partner also change us permanently. However, these tragic experiences can create new energy or spiritual awakening or a transformative life purpose, despite the awfulness of the loss.

Other major life events can create major changes in how we respond to the World. It is a dangerous thing to laugh at the wrong person. Someone may experience lasting repercussions from a life-threatening or life-altering accident or illness. Again, these kinds of experiences can create a new resilience that serves to counterbalance disability, fear, bitterness, and depression. Lives are run in different lengths, and nobody can say what is the matter with some folks, only that their thread’s run out; there is more on one spool and less on another.

The sweeter, the more dangerous. Arsenic is sweeter than sugar. Addiction is another circumstance of adult life that creates its own set of responses in individuals and their loved ones. There is a broad spectrum of addictive behaviors that can change the course of an adult’s life, including well-recognized addictions to substances to substances like alcohol, drugs, food, lies, and sometimes the less obvious process addictions like gambling, overspending, self-injury, sex, work, computer activities, television, and exercise. If you have struggled with an addiction yourself or been involved with an addicted person, you are well aware that this fact of life determines a lot about how you respond in the area of intimate relationships.

A handful of good life is better than a whole bushel of learning. Seemingly neutral life events, such as changing jobs or getting promoted, buying a house, having a baby, moving from one geographical area to another, getting deeply involved in community activism, religious activities, sports, or hobbies can also make a big difference in how we respond to intimacy. Life without a moral purpose is but a passing spectre, and out immortality rests in our religious life.

Those who want the fewest Earthly blessings most regret that they want any. Sometimes past relationships continue to play a major role in our current lives. It sometimes seems as though we repeat the worst of our childhood nightmares in the relationship we create in early adult life. However, we can learn to heal and love again. There will always be something worth living for while there are shimmery afternoons. How I miss that trail of our accompanied footprints in the days of intoxicating friendship.