Love casts out all fear. Through work on ourselves, our relationship becomes a sanctuary and crucible, a place of deep healing, care, life enhancing challenge, and love that pervades all that we are. Do not let your strengths camouflage your weakness. Wow, I was having such a nice day. The weather cooled down by 30 degrees, compared to the same time yesterday, the Sun was muted, had a nice walk through the park, and my neighbors were peaceful. The only thing that was missing was someone by my side.

And then my five year old boy showed up! I was laying and reading a book, when I suddenly started crying. The way I was feeling was the same way I felt when I was a child and my father took away my favorite toy.

I was reading a letter, something a father would write to his son, the man is like 60 years old and his wife is a little younger, and he was expressing how he is so happy for the relationship with his wife, and how every day is an adventure, but he does not have much time left, and it made me cry because it reminded me of people I deeply care about who have passed, and some of the people I love most are in that same age range, and I fear losing them, too.

Because after they are gone, I will not have any close relationships in my life, and I have been trying so hard to establish intimate relationships with other people, but it is so hard because most people seem to be very mean, and want to hurt others and take others down. I fear what will happen if the person I am talking about passes away, as I will be all alone, and with my circumstances that is also very scary because I have not gotten to where I want to be in life.

And it is not that I want this person to stick around just so I have someone to depend on, but also because everyone needs someone in their life who really loves them. Since I have been on my own, I have been doing okay and am thankful for what I have, but the fact of the matter is someone has been trying really hard to ruin my life as best as he and his friends can. And as an adult, you would not expect powerful people to pick on someone not as great, and try to take a person down like life is a rerun of Gossip Girl.

Beside success and career, one of the main goals in everyone’s life is to experience full spectrum intimacy, not only with your partner, but also with who you are, dark and light, high and low, pretty and noble, deep and shallow. Many people hear the things said about me, and they make me laugh, it is so childish to say such sophomoric things, and make fun of people for being injured or assaulted, and that does not bother me. It is just when people go beyond the law and do things that are illegal to hurt others.

When you are in a relationship, you want implicit and rare trust, you want your partner to feel comfortable bring their best to the relationship, but also their worst, so we can face it together and integrate it in ways that serve our relationship. Nothing in us gets left out; it is all part of our relationship. After a good cry, I feel better. It is always a good idea to deepen one’s curiosity about what we least know about ourselves. The better you know your heart and mind, the more available we are for truly intimate a relationship.

Once you are in a stable relationship, never threaten to leave the relationship in order to get your own way or make your partner beg you to stay. If you are feeling manipulative, express this verbally, rather than acting it out. Turn your desire to leave into something to explore rather than acting out. Threats are negative promises, and are usually dependent on moods. If you really want to leave a relationship, such wanting will remain present no matter how good, bad, or indifferent you feel.

You may hurt as you mature, because you are more open to feeling, but you will mind less. Sad emotions are hard for me, but it is good to work through them, and I am looking forward to being happier in the future. I believe that my critics have done all they can possibly do, everyone hears them, and we are tired of the sad stories and evil deeds. They will eventually attract the attention they seek. More people in the World are required to learn how to love, express compassion, integrity, courage, because we are all yearning for a deeper life.

Just keep in mind, everything rises, and no matter how painful life is, this will further our intimacy. And it is such a gift to be so close, so deeply attached and bonded, that we cannot get away for very long, from facing things that we would not ordinarily face. Intimate relationships, fully entered into, keep us on track. Rest in Peace, Tony Scott. If you all get the chance, please watch a filmed called Crimson Tide.

And please take care of yourselves, people are living to be 90 years old these days. Greater than fear is Love. Love dissolves all fear, casts out all doubt and sets the captive free. Love, like the River of Life, flows through me and refreshes me with its eternal blessing. Love cannot be afraid; it is fearless and strong, and is mighty in its works. It can accomplish all things through the inner light of that faith in the all good, which fills my very being with a powerful presence.