We are all of us, more or less, subject to delusions of vanity, or hope, or love. One morning a little tailor sat in his shop, he was bent over his work, sewing as he always did this time of day. Suddenly, the tailor has a taste for jelly, so he took out a loaf of bread, put some butter on it, put it in the oven and toasted the bread, and then applied some boysenberry jelly to the large slice of toast. “I am more hungry than I thought, let us hope this jelly fills my belly,” he told himself.

Before eating his delicious snack, the tailor wanted to sew a few more stiches, so he did. However, after he finished the project he was working on, the tailor say a swarm of gnats buzzing around his tasty, butter toast, with boysenberry jelly. With his hand, the young man waved the gnats away, but they flew right back. So the tailor grabbed a dish rag and like James Bond, the cloth tore through the air as the tailor snapped the rag and killed all seven of the buzzing gnats at once.

The tailor thought, “The entire World should know of my skill!” So he made a belt, just his size, with the finest threads, and sewed the words: “Seven in one blow!” The tailor tired the blue belt around his waist, and felt the need for a big adventure. The tailor looked for something useful to take with him on his journey. All he found was a piece of cheese; he put it in his pocket.  As he was locking the door, he heard a bird wrestling in the bushes; the tailor picked the bird up and put it in his pocket, and then began his adventure.

The tailor walked through town and up the side of a mountain without stopping. At the top of the mountain, he met a giant. “Hello, Giant,” said the tailor, with a bow. “I am on a big adventure Will you join me?”

“A young man like you on a big adventure?” rumbled the giant. For an answer, the tailor showed the giant his belt. The giant read the words: “Seven in one blow!”

The giant found it very hard to believe that this tiny tailor could kill seven men with one blow. So he decided to test the little man’s strength. “Can you do this?” asked the giant. He picked up a stone and squeezed it until the water dripped from the stone.

“Watch this,” the tailor said, as he took something from his pocket. The giant thought it was a stone, too, but it was actually a piece of cheese. The tailor squeezed it until liquid whey dripped from his hand.

The giant raised his eyebrows. “Well, can you do this?” he asked. The giant picked up another stone and tossed it high into the air. It flew into the Heavens.

“What this,” the tailor said, as he took something from his pocket. It was the bird, of course. With a toss of his hand, the tailor sent the little bird flying out of sight.

However, the giant was a poor loser. “Perhaps you would like to come home with me and meet my friend,” the giant said with an evil gleam in his eye. “Certainly,” the tailor replied.

The giant took the tailor to his cave. A group of giants sat around a roaring fire. They watched as their friend led the young man to bed. “You can sleep here,” said the giant. “Even a man who can kill seven in one blow needs to rest.”

The tailor was not sued to such a big bed. So he spelt in a corner on the floor. It was good for him that he did. During the night, the giants pounded on the bed with clubs, until they thought they had taken care of the pesky tailor.

In the morning, the giants went swimming in the river. They joked about the strange man and his silly belt. When the tailor walked up whistling a merry tune, the giants were so afraid, they ran away without their clothes! The tailor laughed and left the giants behind. He walked very far and then lay down for a nap on a soft, grassy hill.

The tailor slept a long time. Some people found him and read his belt. They thought that he was a mighty soldier. When the tailor awoke, the people took him to meet their king. The king has never met a man who could kill seven in one blow. He hired the stranger for his army, and gave him a bag full of gold.

The other soldiers were very angry. “This is not fair, Most High! We will leave your army if we do not get a full bad of gold to make us feel more better.” The king could not lose a whole army over one man. He decided to send the man on a suicide mission. So the Most High went to the little man, with a challenge. “I need you to kill two giants that live in my building. If you do, I will give you my daughter and half my kingdom as a reward.” The tailor knew this was his chance to become a hero.

The tailor went into the building the next morning, One hundred soldiers went with him. As he rode in the King’s Mercedes Benz, the tailor made a plan. “Stay behind until I call you,” he told the soldiers. Then he rode on until he found the two giants, sleeping in their apartments with the doors unlocked. He began bamming  on the door, at 3am, talking about his TV was not working.

The giant awoke and went to his friend’s apartment, and the tailor hit over the head and he died. Then the tailor went to the next apartment and kicked the door down. The giant came out of his apartment, and said, “Who the—,” then he saw his friend laying on the floor dead, and went to offer him assistance, until the giant hit him over the head, and killed him.

The tailor called the king’s soldiers to come and see what he had done. They tailor called the king’s soldiers to come and see what he had done. They were amazed. The new soldier had beaten the giants without getting a scratch. “Two giants are easy compared to killing seven in one blow,” laughed the tailor.

The king heard about the tailor’s great feat, but he was not ready to give up his daughter and half of his riches, yet. So he thought of a plan. “Brave soldier, a wild boar is tearing up the farmers’ houses and cars,” explained the king. “Please catch it for me.”

Off the tailor went to find the boar. He was not sure how he would catch it, but he knew he would think of something. Suddenly, he heard a snort behind him. The boar was coming his way! The tailor ran into the building, through the open door left propped open in the alley. The boar was close behind. The little man crawled out of a window just as the boar came through the doors. The tailor ran to shut the doors. The wild boar was trapped!

When the King came back to the castle, he had a jumbo pack of bacon with him. When the king asked how he had tricked the beast, the proud tailor said, “One who can kill seven in one blow can surely get a silly boar to do what he wants!”

The king tried one last trick to get rid of the tailor. He ordered the little man to catch the unicorn that was scaring the villagers. The tailor agreed to go, but only if he could go alone. The king agreed. So the tailor walked into the woods, looking for the unicorn.

When the tailor heard a crashing and coughing sound, he turned to see the unicorn running straight for him. The tailor stood perfectly still. Just as the unicorn reached him, the tailor jumped out of the way. He had been standing in front of a tree. The unicorn’s horn drove deep into the tree and became stuck in the hard wood.

The tailor freed the unicorn and rode it back to the palace in a cloud of dust. Again the king was amazed to see the tailor. “How did you tame this wild unicorn?” he asked the tailor.

The tailor told the king, “For one who has killed seven in one blow, a unicorn is like a kitten!” The king had no choice, but to keep his promise to the tailor. He ordered his servants to plan a large feast. The tailor and the king’s daughter were married wed in a ceremony that was attended by everyone in the kingdom.

The king thought his new son-in-law was a hero. He did not know that the man who married his daughter and took half his kingdom was only a simple tailor.

The tailor almost gave up his secret one night. His wife heard him say in his sleep, “Boy, make me that waistcoat and patch that gown, or there will be trouble!”

The princess ran to her father. “He is not a hero, Father! He is only a tailor,” she cried.

“Daughter, leave your door open tonight,” said the king. “My soldiers will sneak in and take care of that little man one and for all. You should not be married to a simple tailor.”

The king’s trick heard the king talking about the tailor. He thought highly of the tailor for his courage and skill, so he ran to tell the tailor about the king’s plan.

That night, the tailor pretended to fall asleep. He groaned and then whispered, “Boy, drop your carriage in that water, you need a bath you filthy demon, or else there will be trouble. I have killed seven at one blow, beaten two giants, make bacon of a snorting boar, and tamed a wild unicorn. I am not afraid to make trouble…even with soldiers outside my door.” The soldiers heard this and ran in fear. That is how a simple man’s bravery and brains made him a hero (in his own eyes).

All that glitters is not gold. Watch who you allow in your life; if they do not bring out the best in you, leave them alone. Not only may you put yourself in danger, but your entire family. Sin begets sin. It is a dangerous thing to laugh at the wrong man or woman.